My uniform, which has not been ironed awaits me and reminds me that I still have an unfinished piece of homework lingering on the bedside table. Observing it closely, I notice that I had somehow managed to have completed it and shove it into my bag. I always try my best to be up to date with my school- work and find it is easier to get it done sooner rather than later, (in which I cause myself to starve myself during my lunch hour). However I do not see the point of spending more than an hour over one piece of homework which I have only displayed a mere sentence or two and am unable to receive the point it is trying to project. Other than that I am quite willing to start and complete my work on the day it is set. This way, I am able to set aside some time in the weekend which I find useful in either planning my future or analysing the events of the week and what I have contributed to the well being of others.
My ambition has always been to become a doctor, or to one day discover an outstanding cure for a disease we are still unknown to. It is an important part of my principles that I am able to make a difference to someone’s life for the better, whether it is in love or care. This is the basis of my education and I make an extreme effort in concentrating in my lessons. Some however are undoubtedly laborious and seem to stretch over a long period of time in which I think is possibly wasted, for example going through the exact same topic over a length of 5 lessons. I struggle through these, but feel it is still to my advantage that I have been given the opportunity to be given so much attention.
At lunch, I force myself into the canteen queue and after 10 minutes I am finally able to breathe in the somewhat sickly aromas of the canteen food! I skim through the selection of lumpy mashed potato and processed sheep guts and settle for a sandwich. I had usually made myself a packed lunch, but as I am now less further away from the school I have the opportunity to sleep another hour extra and have taken this advantage to its maximum capacity and sleep through the other ten minutes in which I would have used preparing lunch. I find a suitable place where I lounge with a couple of friends and indulge in our (ever so wonderful!) meal. Looking around the room you are able to feel the true sense of a typical girl school and as I look round each and every girl is plastered with foundation and make up, preened with absolute affection with almost every strand of hair combed into place. This often makes me laugh when I realise I must look an absolute state and resemble nothing closer than a shabby black dog. In a way this also makes me more thoughtful than I already am and I decide that it is better for me to be depressed rather than happy. I find it is easier for me to be unhappy as there is always something more that you would want to achieve in life and if I were to be happy I would actually have to find an excuse for my behaviour. Until I feel that I have achieved something, which will improve it in the future I do not see that there is anything to be ecstatically joyful about. The only reason I believe they need to cover up their face with false expression is that they are not satisfied with the way they already are and therefore makes them less confident than myself.
Occasionally I do enjoy having the company of friends around and appreciate it very much, but the thought of knowing that we may soon part saddens me. I make the most of it and do all the usual things such as shopping, giggling and sleepovers like any normal teenage girl would.
I also like to think that I make an effort in what I wear besides school uniform, as I feel that you are able to express a lot through the way you present yourself and the image and feeling you project to others. I usually stroll the streets of central London every weekend and note in my mind anything that appeals to me and return after the second week with the money I’ve managed to scrounge together and see what I am able to afford. People often say I am stingy with spending my money and I agree. I don’t think that it is necessary to spend lots of money at one time, when it usually turns out that you discover you only have a single penny to contribute to the price of the top you saw only ten minutes later.
After school I do not have any extracurricular activities and return straight home, before blasting the house with my favourite CD which hopefully, and almost certainly manages to cheer me up and prepare me to launch into yet another pile of homework. Yet again there is the thought of the pointless pieces of work I am doing and I wonder off into another world where I dream about my future careers and what I hope to achieve in life.
I sit down and watch another over dramatic screenplay on TV and become enticed by the intense emotions and relative values it has on me. I suddenly find that I have become immersed in the character’s thoughts and am yet again in a trance. When I eventually sense my surroundings again it is by now approximately 2am and worry about what I am to do with my life and at the thought, I begin to feel uneasy about my level of sanity before forcing myself into another sleepless night.