Now, what to say to Olivia? I have to carry out my master’s wishes, but she has already made it clear she has no feelings for him! Still he persists though, always walking around looking lovesick, why only this morning the duke said
‘Get thee to yond sovereign cruelty, Tell her of my love, more noble than the world’ showing his incessant nature.
What followed though confirmed my suspicions about him being just in love with her status and title, I remember well, he said:
‘Prizes not quantity of dirty lands; the parts that fortune hath bestowed upon her’ it proves that Duke Orsino just thinks he is in love with the countess Olivia, he is so overcome by her money and power, otherwise he would not talk about it in such a way. Or maybe it is just wishful thinking on my part, I am in love with the Duke very much. I think he respects me and considers me important, he asks my opinion all the time like this morning he said
‘How dost thou like this tune?’ and I replied ‘It gives a very echo to the seat where love is thron`d’
I was talking about my heart, though he didn’t seem pick up on it I realise now he was talking to Cesario myself in disguise. The Duke replied to me ‘thou dost speak masterly’ It sent a small shiver down my spine. This I fear led me to reveal to much, I claimed I was in love with someone, he asked me what she was like, and I said ‘of your complexion’ and he asked me of her years and I added ‘about your years my lord’
When Feste sang the song of love, I felt such a connecting bond with Duke Orsino, the frustration of not being able to say anything really got to me. However if I revealed my true identity, surely he would think of me as no more than a common liar. It is a strange feeling because before, I have always been in control of my emotions and known what I should do, but I stand here as another person in another land completely unaware of what should be lurking around the corner, and what to do about the situation I appear to be in.
All this is puzzling me so much, how I wish I could just run from it, but that would mean fleeing from my true love. And I must admit this has all been an adventure for me. I have met many interesting people, especially in the countess Olivia’s residence like the idealistic and almost pompous Malvolio, for Olivia sent a ring to me through him, and when he spoke he proved his qualities, he said ‘if this ring be worth stooping for..’ then dropped the ring on the floor!
Or maybe my predicament will turn out like I explained to the Duke about my make believe sister (meaning me) he said ‘what is her history’ and I replied ‘a blank my lord, she never told of her love’
Hopefully not as I cant stand the thought of feeling like this forever. I am trapped in this little world until something or someone gets me out.
I am nearing Olivia’s house now, the closer I get and the more worried it makes me feel. The Dukes passion for Olivia is great, but it’s hopeless he does not know her, only of her looks, money and title. Like a small mouse chasing a broad lion. Is that what its like for me, could I just be caught up with Duke Orsino’s status? No, I know his person, and the more I know I fall in love with him all over again.
For now though I must concentrate on the task at hand.