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Visiting Bognor.

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When you visit Bognor the first thing you will notice is the weather. It's the gloomiest place on the planet. My Gran lives there, that's about the worst insult you can give a place. I presume about half the grannies on the planet live there. The name Bognor it sounds like a waste disposal company. It's the type of name that puts you of your dinner. Bognor's best attribute is probably its fish and chips shops. They are pretty abysmal to say the least. The assistants barely speak English and can't be bothered to serve you ; they don't even really want your money, what are they going to spend it on they live in Bognor . The Bognorians under close inspection all resemble each other. Bognorians seem to have a very similar facial structure. Maybe this is because they always stay in Bognor, for the fear of not being accepted in a real civilization. ...read more.


The only problem is that he goes to the pub; so he can get completely pissed and put on even more weight. My gran thinks he is amazing because all her friend's husbands never leave the house. She take pride in the fact that he gets drunk every night, so drunk that most days she a woman of sixty-seven has to carry him a ball of lard into bed. They are an inspiration to all Bognorians . Bognor's most irritating aspect from my perspective is probably the arcades. People go in so that they can get away from the wind and perceptual rain. Plus the chance of winning 2p on the twenty pence machines is irresistible to say the least. These arcades are situated on the beaches, they are there because people go to the beaches thinking sea sand sun what can go wrong. ...read more.


Bognor's B&B's are some of the worst in the country. They are usually owned by dying grannies. The Grannies are always very nice, they have to be to make up for the appalling living conditions. You get one room for between two and six people and the beds, what beds, every small movement causes a bruise from springs which dig into your every move. These beds were probably the same beds the grannies had when they were children. That makes the beds more than two hundred years old. Once again the all of Bognor's inhabitants wake up to the stench full smell of Bognor. Mrs Branbells , my gran pokes Mr Branbells with the broom until he wakes up with a huge groan, and the smell of beer. The tourist family staying in the B&B roll over to get a poke from a loose spring in their bed; one local decides to go to the beach and get a mouth full of bird poo, and everything is dull in Bognor. ?? ?? ?? ?? Bognor ...read more.

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