c hallenging a client to change

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Module 9

Part B

Introduction

In this essay I have chosen to write about challenging client’s responses, I will look at the Gestalt theory of challenge and then use a counselling session with a client to describe how I invited challenge to move forward with my client’s issues.

Challenging a client’s responses

Counselling is more than active and empathetic listening. Part of effective counselling might also mean confronting the client with certain aspects of, for example, self-defeating behaviour or thoughts and feelings that are odd with progress.

Using the basic active listening skills may take the client someway along the path of self-awareness, yet more may be needed to help the client gain a deeper understanding of the problem and its root cause. In this essay I will write about the insight into the skills the counsellor uses to facilitate understanding. These skills, unfortunately termed” challenging and confronting”, invite clients to examine their behaviour and its consequences. In other words, by encouraging clients to come face to face with themselves, they develop the skill of self-challenge and the potential to change. However, it needs to be borne in mind that in the context of counselling, challenges and confrontations are always offered with the client’s best interests at heart, as a gift, not an attack.

The skills need to be used with great sensitivity, care and respect. They need to come out of the deep empathy with the client, and should not be used until trust has been established.

The aim of challenging is to provide accurate information and to offer our perspective. We challenge the strengths of the client rather than the weaknesses. Pointing out the strengths, assets and resources which the client may fail to fully use. Challenging and confronting helps clients develop new perspectives.

Confronting a client: Confronting clients with something they might prefer not to see, might not want to hear, or might not want to know, is not easy. It can be a painful learning process for the client, as well a risky business for the counsellor. It takes guts to challenge a client, and the counsellor may well be left wondering whether he has said the right thing. It can also be an exhausting experience for both. In counselling, the aim of a challenge is to help the client face reality, as it is seen through the eyes of the counsellor. The force of the challenge depends on the type of counselling. In some instances it is offered as an observation, in others it is very strong and confronting.

There are times when it is wiser to ignore than to comment.  These are times, however, when it could be valuable for the client to know how the counsellor feels about something. The client may benefit form being confronted with the possible outcome of his behaviour or some contemplated course of action. Sometimes it is difficult to challenge without it being interpreted as a judgement.

Some specific points about challenging are:

  • A challenge is not a verbal fight
  • A challenge should be a tentative suggestion, not a declaration
  • A challenge is an observation, not an accusation.
  • A challenge should be made only after careful deliberation.
  • A challenge should never be used as retaliation, nor as a put-down.
  • A challenge is safest when the relationship is well established.

The main areas of challenge:

  • Discrepancies
  • Distortion of feelings
  • Self-defeating thought patterns
  • Self-defeating behaviours
  • Games, tricks and smokescreens
  • Manipulation
  • Excuses:
  • Complacency
  • Rationalisation
  • Procrastination

      -     Passing the Buck

Blind spots

  • Simple unawareness
  • Self-deception
  • Choosing to stay in the dark
  • Knowing but not caring

Mindsets

  • Prejudices
  • Beliefs and assumptions
  • Passivity
  • Negative thought patterns

A challenge should be preceded by careful consideration of:

  • What is the purpose of the challenge?
  • Can I handle the consequences?
  • Does the challenge relate to the here and now?
  • Whose needs are being met by the challenge?

In the counselling world there are many theories in challenging a client’s responses. I have chosen to use the Gestalt theory to describe ways in which this theory uses techniques to invite a client to challenge their thoughts, feelings or behaviour.

Gestalt Counselling

Gestalt Therapy was developed by Fritz Perls (1893-1970) his aim was to help the client to be self –supportive and self-responsive, through awareness of what is going on within the self at any given moment, the “here and now”. Gestalt therapy is heavily influenced by existentialism, psychodrama and body therapies. The therapy is based on the principle that mental processes and behaviour cannot be analysed into elementary units, they come complete.

Gestalt therapy is usually preformed in groups, though many of the techniques are applicable in individual work with a client. The aim of the therapy is to get clients to move from environmental support to self-support through their increased ability to use the world actively for their own development instead of manipulating the environment by playing neurotic roles.

Perls rejected the belief that human beings are determined and controlled by external and /or internal factors. This belief is reflected in two of his basic ideas:

  • That human beings are responsible for themselves and their lives and living
  • That the important question about human experience and behaviour is not why but how. The more we strive to be what we are not, the more entrenched we become in not being who we are not.

Implicit in these ideas is the belief that human beings are free and can change, He rejected the dualities of mind and body, body and soul, thinking and feeling, thinking and action and feeling and action. The rejection of dualities is inherent in the concept of holism. Human beings are unified organisms and always function as a whole.

Principles of Gestalt theory

  1. Holism. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts, thus the client must be viewed as a whole person, all dimensions of human functioning. The emphasis is on integrating every part.
  2. Field theory. The client must be viewed in the context of his environment. Thus therapy would concentrate on what is happening at the boundary between the person and the environment.
  3. The figure-formation process. This distinguishes between the background and the figure, identifying what is the figure and what is the ground is important to help the client make sense out of the chaos.

The principle of homeostasis

Homeostasis is a state of equilibrium produced by a balance of functions within an organism. The basic tendency of every organism is to strive for balance; The organism is faced with external and internal factors that disturb the balance. Restoration of balance is self-regulating. The need is satisfied. The process starts again. Incomplete gestalts are called unfinished business

The emphasis of Gestalt counselling is on:

  • Change through activity
  • The central meaning of present experience
  • The importance of fantasy and creative experimentation, particularly using the right, creative hemisphere, through not ignoring the contribution of the left structured hemisphere
  • The significance of language.
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Here and now awareness

The Gestalt therapy slogan is “I and thou”, “here and now”. Only the now exists. Problems solved in the present solve problems of the past. The client is not allowed to talk about problems in the past tense or in terms of memories. The client is asked to experience them now in his/her breathing, gestures, feelings, emotions and voice. The manner of expression, not the content of the words, is what is important.

The basic sentence the client is required to repeat is “now I am aware”

Other variations maybe;

  • What are you aware ...

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