After many discussions and a few tears, it was finally my dear grandmother who advised her protective son to let me go if he would want to keep me. By now, I am sure, if I had not been allowed to leave by then, I would have probably developed a burning desire for freedom and, thus, would have left my parents´ “prison” right after my graduation. However, I was allowed to leave. Again and again. And it was my parents´ trust and this giving of space that not only felt like freedom but also added a joyful flavour of possibilities to the situation. In comparison, everything felt so dense, tight and sticky during my “tear-time”.
I suppose Forbes´ wisdom can be compared to the example of a cat locked in a room. Without rest, she would look for a way to escape from the room. Would the door be opened we most probably find a relaxed cat stretched out on the sunny desk of our table. What is it then that makes this difference? Or – how can we actually learn to be relaxed not only in a locked room but also in every situation?
I suppose, if we are too attached to whatever things get sticky. The situation gets sticky. This freedom or awareness that everything is possible and this trust that the situation will turn out in the right way, gets lost. This is about being too attached. And it is also about certain expectation. Perhaps, we expect that a situation will turn out in the same way as experienced beforehand, and by doing so we are not open for whatever could happen in the next situation. It is like a couple being freshly in love and experiencing a wonderful moment together. I believe they should fully enjoy this moment of love, but then go on in life. Because attachment to this special experience will make them expect it to happen again next time they are in the same situation. Then it might not happen… and the misery starts.
Of course, it is not all that easy to be free from all, to expect nothing but be relaxed in every situation. Personally, I believe the first step towards this relaxation is awareness about things, about the causes and the effects they have. Lately, (it was not the first time) I had the pleasure of encountering a stranger in public who yelled at me for no good reason. Instead of taking this public insult personal and, thus, saying bad things about him as well, I tried to keep in mind, I tried to really become aware that it is most probably not my behaviour but something bad that he experienced which makes him yell at me now. Of course, if he had a good reason it’s best to realize one’s mistake and to excuse oneself for it. However, even though I was surely right and he simply rude, I still try to keep that impersonal and joyful view and, thus, made the inward wish for Mr. Bad-tempered to soon have good sex again.
Essay
level of formality: rather informal
intended audience: friends; people who have an interest in my personal thoughts/ world perception.
purpose: inform, persuade.
BENOTUNG:
content: 1
style: 3
