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Friendshipin the West & Friendship in Islam

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Friendship in the West & Friendship in Islam It is natural for people to form friendships with others whom they interact with on a regular basis. Friendships can be formed through growing up in the same neighbourhood, meeting at school, college, university, social gatherings and via a number of other activities. Friendship is something common amongst people, however there are different conceptions of it. Some common conceptions include the following: friends will always stick by your side, you can always rely on a friend, you can speak freely to your friend and tell them your problems, friends like you for who you are, etc. When people have personal problems such as disputes with their family members or if they require advice they usually turn to their friends. Friendship in the West Friendship in the West is based on benefit. Friends come together on the basis of mutual interest, so they will go to the cinema, parties and clubbing together. They talk about the opposite sex freely to each other and hide each others secrets even if they involve evil actions. They often gain comfort in backbiting and winging about other people who they don't like. Unfortunately some Muslims carry the Western notion of friendship as they follow the crowd rather than to looking to Islam for solutions. Due to the fact that friendship is based on benefit in the West, it is easy for people to 'break out' with each other, have rows and even become enemies. This happens when their interests conflict and can be over petty things such as not going for a night out with them or larger things such as betrayal. In many cases people even talk negatively about some of their friends in front of others and even betray them by having affairs with their wife, sisters or girlfriend. Friends even become status symbols, so people long to 'hang out' with a particular crowd to look cool. ...read more.


[Sahih Muslim, Tirmithi] Belittling each other is almost a pastime in the West. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, ???? ???? ?? ???? ?? ???? ???? ?????? "The believer can do no worse than belittle his brother". [Iyah Uloom ad Deen] A Muslim should not hold grudges against another Muslim even if they are differing personalities. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) warned against this when he said, "The gates of Paradise will be open on Mondays and on Thursdays, and every servant [of Allah] who associates nothing with Allah will be forgiven, except for the man who has a grudge against his brother. [About them] it will be said: Delay these two until they are reconciled; delay these two until they are reconciled; delay these two until they are reconciled". [Muslim] Friends should feel at ease with each other without feeling inferior or superior. Ego's must be tamed according to Islam. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, "A man is on a par with the Deen of his friend and there is no good in the fellowship of one who does not regard you as highly as himself". [Iyah Uloom ad Deen] Concealing faults It is important to conceal a friends faults, this does not mean that we ignore them; it means that we advise them and help them overcome their shortcomings. Uqbah ibn Amir narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, ?? ??? ???? ????? ???????? ?????? ??????? ?? ????? "He who sees something which should be kept hidden and conceals it, it will be like the one who has brought to life a girl buried alive" [Hadith 2292: Abu Dawud] Abu Hurayrah narrated that Allah's Apostle (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, ??? ??? ????? ???? ???? ?? ?????? ??????? ????? ?? ??? ????? ?? ??? ????? ?? ??? ???? "He who conceals (the faults) of a Muslim, Allah would conceal his faults in the world and in the Hereafter. ...read more.


He said, "No, it is just that I love him for Allah, the Mighty and Magnificent." He said, "Then I am a messenger sent by Allah to you (to inform you) that Allah loves you as you have loved him for Allah's sake." The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) also said, ?? ??? ?? ??? ????? ??????? ????? ????? ?? ???? ??? ???? "Whoever would like to taste the sweetness of Iman (belief) then let him love a person only for Allah's sake" [Ahmad] It was reported by Abu Dawud that Umar ibn al-Khattab narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, " ????? ???? ?????? ?????? ???????? ??????????? ????????????? ????????????? " ????? ???? ???? ??? ?????? ?????? ?????????? ?????????? ? ????? " ???? ????? ?????????? ??? ?????? ???? ????? ???????? ????? ???????? ????????? ???? ????? ???????? ???? ???? ??? ?????????? ????? ????? ??????? ????? ??????????? ????? ?????? ??????? " ????? ?????? " ????? ????? ?????????? ?????? ??? ????? ?????????? ????? ???? ??????????? " "Indeed from the servants of Allah there are some who are not Prophets, yet they will be envied by the Prophets and the martyrs". It was asked, "Who are they? That we may love them". He (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, "They are people who have mutual love through light from Allah, not due to kinship or ancestry, their faces will be enlightened, upon pillars of light, they will not fear when the people fear, or grieve when the people grieve". Then he (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) recited: "No doubt! Verily, on the friends of Allah there is no fear nor shall they grieve" [TMQ 10: 62] In conclusion, it should be apparent that we can't live in isolation and require company. Friendship provides a natural support structure the Muslim community. Therefore we should ensure that the company we keep helps us in remembering Allah (Subhanahu wa ta'aala) and strengthens our commitment to Islam. This is more important for us living in the West as the corrupt society continuously bombards us with its poisonous culture and attempts to catch us in its net. By Abdul-Hamid Jassat ...read more.

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