Looking at life.

I like to help people.

but refuse help when I need it.

I want to give it up for God.

but yet again.

and again.

I stop myself.

I cower in the corner.

when people ask.

who I am.

what I believe.

It's so important.

so passionate.

and yet it hides.

deep inside.

where only those who I choose.

can get to see it.

I allow the evil.

Bad.

sin.

grip me.

I let it hold on.

to drag me down.

I don't want to drown.

In a pit of flaming sulphur.

So again.

and again.

I turn to you.

I run to you.

the almighty.

the biggest.

the best.

the greatest.

the holy one.

and I fall down.

on my knees.

weeping.

at your feet.

where I see the scars.

that caused the pain.

that set me free.

at the foot of the cross.

I cry out to you.

and I ask.

forgive me.

and again.

and again.

you say.

yes.

my child.

I forgive you.

then I walk.

away.

thinking.

of the grace you have.

and yet again.

and again.

I choose to hide it.

that is the thing.

that breaks me.