When her mother was a child, there was a lot of jealousy in her family. 'She never had much time for me. I was just a girl, she preferred my brother.' The mother feels rejected and she does not want her daughter to feel the same way that she does. The jealousy between her family causes more complications between her and her daughter.
The upbringing of her mother has certainly influenced the way the mother is trying to bring up her daughter. As I have explained, there was a lot of jealousy between her mother's family, it also appears that the mother and her own mother did not have a very good relationship. It appears that the mother felt rejected and that her brother was favoured. She did not want the same thing to happen between her and her daughter so she tried to be as close as her daughter as possible. Her daughter's upbringing has definitely been influenced by her own. The daughter however seems reluctant for a successful relationship between her and her mother.
The parental role is obviously very important to the parents, as they are trying to keep their daughter's behaviour under control. However in several situations, they contradict themselves: 'As a young girl I'd have been hit if I used such language as I've heard you used'. 'Your father didn't mean to call you a dirty slut'. Here they are criticising the daughters use of bad language. However when the father calls her a dirty slut, the mother simply makes excuses for him stating 'Its just a manner of speaking.' This would clearly frustrate the child. The parents are backing each other up and ganging up on the daughter, this could be emotionally damaging and could make her even more reluctant to be willing to make the effort to improve her relationship with her parents.
There is no evidence to show that her parents have any trust, belief or confidence in their daughter. Several things prove they have no trust in their daughter. They disapprove of the things she does and rarely let her out even little things she does have do be questioned. ' What did you hav for lunch today? I hope you ate something.' This clearly proves that they have very little trust in their daughter.
The mother tries very hard to make the relationship between them work. She tries to make her daughter more like her. 'Its cosy in here. Peaceful, too. I've unplugged the telephone so that I can concentrate on you and we shan't be disturbed. It'll be dark soon, the street lamps hav just come on, I can see one shining through the curtains. Funny, you never did like these curtains. I remember I got them in a sale up in town, I thought they were lovely, really modern with these splashes of white and grey, they were exactly what I would have wanted as a girl. Then when you came home and saw what I had done you flew into a temper, you said you wanted the old curtains back. By then it was too late, I'd thrown them away. I'd gone to so much trouble to give you a surprise, I couldn't believe you'd be so ungrateful. Then you had to go and burst into floods of tears, that was the last straw, oh you used o be so unkind to me. Throwing my presents back in my face.' There is so much evidence in that extracts proving that the mother wants her daughter to be like her and was disappointed that she was not. Mainly the underlined.
When the new shoes were bought, it could signify a new beginning. 'They are perfect because they are new, they've never been worn.' This also tells us there have been problems between the mother and daughter.
I think that the way the mother was brought up definitely influenced the way she brought up her own child, this was not necessarily a good thing. Her mother craved closeness between the two of them and did not want what happened between her and her mother to happen to them. Her childhood obviously affected her life and the way she brings up her daughter. She has not had much success in her relationship with her daughter and has tried to make her more like her and better behaved. This however did not succeed and she bought her new shoes to signify what I believe as a new beginning.