(The Munchkins enter)
Munchkin 1: We welcome you to Munchkin Land
Munchkin 2: To munckin land
Munchkin 3: munchkin land!
Munchkin 4: Hehehehehe
Dorothy: Wow, little people! Do you know who that woman crushed under my house is?
All Munchkin: ‘Gasp’ you killed the wicked witch of the east!
Munchkin Song: Ding-dong the witch is dead
The witch old witch
The wicked witch
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead!
Verse mixed up, no one knows words!
Ding-dong the witch is dead
The witch old witch
The wicked witch
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead!
Dorothy: Thank you! Do you know how I can get home?
Munchkin 4: You need the nice witch of the north!
(Awkward Silence)
NWN: (Offstage) Is that my cue?
All: Yes!
NWN: Sorry! (She walks on in the wrong costume) Here I am!
Munckin (all): Oh no! it’s the wicked witch of the west!
NWN: What? Oh crap! Wrong costume! Sorry! (she walks off and on again in the right costume) Here I am! And all you have to do to get home Dorothy is to follow the yellow brick road and see the wizard of Oz in emerald city!
Kate: But its blue.
NWN: What? Oh yes! Bloody set painters!
Munchkins: Follow the blue brick road, follow the blue brick road, follow follow follow follow follow the blue brick road!
(Dorothy skips off, swinging Toto behind her. Scene change to scarecrow hanging there)
Dorothy: Wow Toto look! It’s a scarecrow!
Scarecrow: Hello. Where are you going?
Dorothy: I’m going to Emerald city to see the wizard of Oz!
Scarecrow: Wow. Can I come? I need a…. um…. What is that thing again?
Dorothy: A brain?
Scarecrow: Hey! That’s not very nice? I mean yes, a brain!
Dorothy: Well come down and skip with me!
Scarecrow: Ok! (he gets stuck) Little help!
Dorothy: Huh?
Scarecrow: I'm stuck!
Dorothy: Oh! Crap! (she helps him down)
Scarecrow: Thanks! Lets go!
(Scene changes to Tinman standing there looking bored. Dorothy skips on with scarecrow)
Dorothy: Look Scarecrow! It’s a Tinman!
Tinman: ‘Alright?’
Scarecrow: It’s your cue.! They call me an idiot!
Tinman: Oh right yeah. Muffle muffle…
Dorothy: I think he needs oil!
Tinman: muffle muffle, (no shit Sherlock)
(Dorothy walks over to him and looks for oil)
Dorothy: Where’s the oil?
Tinman: muffle muffle. (There…oh shit).
(Deodorant can thrown on from offstage, hits tin man on head)
Tinman: OW! (makes come on then sign)
(Dorothy squirts deodorant)
Tinman: Now I’m free! If only I had a heart to go with this. Because then I could love and be happy!
Dorothy: Why don’t you come with us to emerald city?
Tinman: Ok!
(Lions and tigers and bears oh my song. Lion creeps up behind them and falls over a lot. Eventually he catches their attention)
Lion: Aah don’t hurt me, I'm just a little pussy…cat! pussy-cat!
Scarecrow: Riiight…
Dorothy: Why don’t you come with us to the emerald city to find courage?
Lion: Ok! By the way that’s a nice bit of lunch you’ve got there (points at Toto)
Dorothy: Sicko! (picks Toto up and carries him)
(were off to see the wizard song.)
Lion: Oh look it’s a flying monkey!
(Monkey flies down and knocks everyone out)
(Scene change to witches tower. WWW in wrong costume…again)
WWW: Hwahaha! Now I have you Dorothy and you're little… LINE!….(someone shouts dog to her) dog too! Hwahahaha!
Tinman: I thought you’re the wicked witch of the west?
WWW: I am!
(Tin man points to hair)
WWW: (realising has wrong costume) Oh bugger not again! (walks off and back again in right costume) Right! Where was I? Oh yes: Hwahahahaha!
Scarecrow: You’ll never get away with it!
WWW: Yes I Will. Hwahahaha!
Dorothy: No you wont! Oh look a bucket of water! (she throws the water at her)
WWW: Noooo, I’m melting, melting (gets up and slips back down again) Noo (walks off slipping)
Lion: Hooray! Lets go and see the wizard now!
(they skip around for a bit and come to emerald city. A guard stands there)
Guard: Halt no one goes in without an appointment!
Dorothy: But we have to see the wizard!
Guard: Do you have an appointment?
Dorothy: Well no but….
Scarecrow: Shhh! Yeah we do.
Guard: Oh alright then in you go.
(Scene changes to wizard palace)
Wizard: What do you want? I am the powerful wizard of Oz!
Lion: P…P…P…Please sir, I would courage, this scarecrow would like a brain…
Scarecrow: Harsh…
Lion: This tinman would like a heart and Dorothy just wants to go home.
Wizard: No! Hwahaha
(Dorothy throws Toto at him. He fall over and reveals he is not a wizard)
Tinman: You're not a wizard at all!
Wizard: You revealed my secret! I suppose I have to give you what you want now.
Lion: Yes P…P…P...Please
Wizard: Mr. Lion. You don’t need courage, you just need to stick up for your self and think “I’m king of the jungle”
Lion: “I'm king of the jungle” Grrr! Gee thanks Mr.Wizard
Wizard: Mr. Tinman, you don’t need a heart, you were being nice to Dorothy all this time, and all you really need is someone to love you.
Tinman: Ok! Gee thanks Mr. Wizard!
Wizard: And you Mr. Scarecrow, all you need is a book on maths, that should get you started on being smart!
Scarecrow: Gee thanks Mr.Wizard!
Dorothy: What about me Mr.Wizard?
Dorothy: You Dorothy, just need to click your heels three times and say, “there’s no place home”
Dorothy: Here goes nothing, “there’s no place home. there’s no place home. there’s no place like home”
(Everyone goes off except for Dorothy)
Dorothy: It worked!
Finis!
