A War Story - Original Writing

toreveal a gun. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion. Hisarm carried on flying upwards and a bullet came soaring out of therevolver. My eyes blurred as I couldn’t see what was happening. Myfather’s over-sized brain had just been shot. He fell onto our stonyfloor with a loud thud. This couldn’t have been happening; my father’scorpse was lying in front of my inexperienced eyes. My mother somehowexhausted a shriek and began screaming. Shahid collapsed onto thefloor not being able to take it. The savage holding me let go of meand picked up Shahid instead.“Shut up you crazy witch or I’ll take your son too” but Ammi had gonecrazy. She continued to yell on the top of her elderly voice. Theterrorist located his gun onto Shahid’s forehead and stormed out ofthe room. The shock was too much for me to take as my petite, fifteenyear old body buckled onto the floor. My eyes closed softly and theentire world and frustrations filtered through.November 19th 2004A gentle hand reached up onto my cheeks to wipe away my tears. Iturned around to see where this comforting touch was coming from tosee my fiancée, Tariq blessing me with his presence. My heart filledwith the same love and affection that lived in my heart before thatfatal day. Tariq is the type of boy that every girl wishes for. He’scaring, thoughtful and knows exactly how to treat me. I looked up athim with a look resembling that of a tortured child longing for onesmall hug and Tariq recognised it instantly and gave me the magicalhug I truly needed and deserved.“It’s okay, don’t worry honey, I’m here” his sweet voice calmed me sosoftly.“I miss him so much. Even with you here with me it doesn’t help me”Tariq tightened his grip around me“Ammi’s waiting for you downstairs, come, and don’t worry aboutanything”We let go of each other and walked down to the mosque. We could not behugging in front of my mother as we were not yet married. We creptdown the decaying steps and to Ammi. We could see the same beads oftears trickling down her cheeks that dwelled there after every mosquevisit. I reached out and gave her the same hug that Tariq had justgiven her and advised her to calm down. This was a daily pastime forour small incomplete family. Ammi at the mosque; me remembering theterrors; Tariq calming me down and me transferring that love to Ammi.“Ammi, I’ve made a decision, and I want yours and Sheeza’s approval onit” This comment slightly perplexed me.“Yes, our approval and blessings are always with you. But out ofcuriosity, what exactly is your decision?” Ammi answered.“I know how much pain and misery Shahid’s kidnapping has bought youand therefore I request that Sheeza and I go and find him.” Mothergave him a look of confusion that rapidly turned into a look ofreassurance.“The police are trying their best.”“The police aren’t doing anything! The police have been ‘doing theirbest’ for seven years and look we still haven’t found him!” Tariqdespised the Kashmiri police because they were malevolent andincredibly corrupt.“Calm down Tariq” I placed my hand onto his shoulder in comfort “But Imust admit I’m intrigued, please proceed”“I propose that Sheeza and I go around the terrorism hotspots withHassan-““-No! Hassan has been trouble since the tender age of fourteen! Idon’t want you to endanger yours and Sheeza’s life too!”“Ammi! Let him finish na”“Hassan and his gang for security and try to find Shahid”“Sheeza should not go with you; she is a young woman that can face allsorts of risks”“But she’ll be with me and Hassan treats her like his big sister” Ammitook a minute to think about it while I pondered, was this the rightthing for me to do? It was true that being reunited after such a longtime would be the answer to many of our devastations but Ammi wasright, being a young woman exposed to Kashmiri terrorism was a hugerisk. I decided I was willing to take it. Anything for Shahid.“Ammi, please I’m willing to take any risk to get Shahid back” Then acurious thing happened, Ammi began crying! Tariq ran towards her andput his arm around her, I ran to put my arm on her other shoulder“I’ve already lost your father and your brother, please don’t make melose the only person I have left” We both hugged her tightly anddecided to overlook it for now*****After Abu and Shahid left the family, Ammi and I were unable to livein Kashmir without men around. At that moment Hassan’s family adoptedus into theirs and we grew up with them around. Ammi did not enjoybeing trapped into Hassan’s world but there was no other alternativeso we accepted it and stayed with them. Ammi always insured thoughthat our beliefs on Islamic principles never became as extreme asHassan’s.“Sheeza, go back to sleep, please” That’s Shamaila, Hassan’s sisterthat I live with. She’s right I need to sleep.*****“Wake up Sheeza! Ammi has some important news for you and Tariq”Shamaila screeched. My eyes slowly fluttered open thinking of whatthis news may be and the moment I remembered I leaped out of bed andraced my shadow down the steps to see Tariq, Hassan and Ammi allseated together waiting for my arrival. Tariq looked quite confusedbut once seeing me he looked calmed. Hassan had a wide grin on hisface and smiled once I walked in.“Sheeza, sit” I looked befuddled at this canine command but did as mymother demanded. “I have spent my entire evening examining Tariq’sproposal and have come to my final decision. I have spoken to Hassanabout the worst scenarios and am convinced you are in good hands.Therefore you may go provided that you’re responsible adults about theentire situation.” I couldn’t believe it; I was going to find mybrother, finally!“Thank you so much Ammi. You won’t regret this, I promise. Sheeza weneed to pack”*****My eyes had been glued to my feet for the past three hours. Lookingout the window made me feel death and destruction in the worst wayspossible due to the horrendous Kashmiri war. I found my refuge inTariq’s eyes for a while but became more conscious of my actions withHassan’s gang staying around me. Their extremity of preaching Islamicprinciples weren’t as strong as mine.My hand reached into my handbag and took out a picture of Shahid. Itwas a fourteen your old picture of me and him, yet I didn’t need apicture to find him. Every single tone of his face lived inside myheart, yet Tariq didn’t know what he looked like.“Sheeza, we’re nearing the biggest terrorism hotspot. Get your thingstogether and please be careful”My heart leapt with a mixture of joy and suspense as I got my thingsand got out of the car. My feet felt very heavy and my footsteps feltlike weights were strapped around my ankles. This lump had appearedinto my throat that felt as large as a bulldozer. We walked on andHassan’s gang made a formation around me to protect me, we continuedwalking down into the biggest death wish possible and I put my footinto the death-zone. I looked around the room and started scanningevery single face in sight.“Is there anyone in here named Shahid?” Hassan proclaimed. Humorously,seven people turned around at the mention of the name. I scanned theseseven people thoroughly. Tariq’s grip tightened on my shoulder becauseone of the Shahid’s began looking at me in a perverted way.The Shahid’s formed a line which quite resembled a line a criminalline-up. Tariq and I walked down the line and began studying mypotential brothers.“Sheezu?” My heart leaped! A deep voice came from behind me, I turnedaround so fast my neck cricked and in front of me was Shahid! He’dchanged so much but his eyes remained that same grey colour. He’dbecome exceedingly tall forcing me to strain my neck to look into hiseyes. His lips were a shade of pink that complimented his lightcomplexion. He had a small beard caressing his manly chin and colossalAdam’s apple. But the look in his eyes had a look of the same fourteenyear old boy he had left behind. But the love in my heart totallyvanished as I saw the rifle in his hand. I felt as if my heart hadbeen knocked over. My brother was a terrorist.“Shahid! What are you doing here?” I enquired“Sheeza? This is no place for a woman to be! Why are you walkingshamelessly with a group of men and without at least covering yourhead?”“I’ve heard so much about you sir, I am Tariq, your brother-in-law tobe”“As in, you’re marrying my sister?” Tariq beamed “CongratulationsSheeza!” My face glowed. Tariq looked across at the Shahid that waslooking at me “Let’s talk somewhere else, this place isn’t safe foryou” A smile grew onto my face like a rash, I was with my brother! Thebrother I’d spent so long wanting to be near. The brother Ammi hadgiven everything up for. I was standing next to him! The excitementwas too much for me that I fainted*****Shahid was sitting at the top of my bed looking furious. Thisbamboozled me slightly. I inspected the rest of the room looking yourTariq’s handsome face but could not find it.“Where’s Tariq?” I asked my little brother“Don’t marry him Sheeza. I don’t approve of him at all. You can domiles better Bhaji, just please don’t marry him”“Shahid nothing you can do can influence my decision on Tariq. He isthe one Allah has made for me”“If you don’t want to listen to me then I forbid you from marryinghim. Bhaji you are not to marry him”“Shahid, what’s wrong? Let’s forget him for now; I want to ask yousome questions”“I’m not going to forget this issue this easily, but for now let’sproceed” There was a brief pause while I tried to conceive a way ofsaying it.“After the kidnapping, why did you never try to escape, to come home”Shahid looked at me in a very forgiving way.“Sheeza, I did escape,”“But you never came home” Shahid inhaled deeply“I escaped from home; the whole kidnapping was set up to free me fromthat cage” I felt as if I’d just been punched. Were my ears defyingme?“What did you need to escape from at home?”“Abu, Ammi. They didn’t understand Allah in the same way I did and Abuwas annoying me.”“He was annoying you? Our father is dead! You gave him so much troubleyet you won’t leave his soul to rest either?”“Listen to me Sheeza; I could no longer survive in that caged world. Ineeded a way out somewhere”“But you could’ve written to tell Ammi and me you were still alive!Ammi sat praying every moment of the day for two years hoping you weregoing to return. You never came and she destroyed her life looking foryou! No one expected you to be here out of all places. You’re aterrorist Shahid!”“I am helping Kashmir gain the independence they deserve!”“Shahid! You are helping kill the entire population. By the timeyou’ve finished ‘helping gain independence’ there won’t be a Kashmirleft to make independent!”“You can’t just walk into my happy life like this and preach to me! Atleast I’m trying to help”“Help? You call terrorism help? Terrorists terrorize! You’re nothelping at all!”“Well what are you doing to help Kashmir?”“I’m making sure the children of the state get an education. I’m ateacher and I feel I’m doing something special”“Look let’s ease of the subject”“Yes that’s a good idea. Where’s Tariq?”“Tariq’s gone”“What do you mean by that?” I looked at him very confused. Shahidlooked very apologetic about something. I carried on looking at himquite puzzled. “Shahid, What’ve you done?”“We came to a huge disagreement and he isn’t right for you”“Oh now my little brother that walked out of my life seven years agois going to tell me how to life my life when he doesn’t know how tolive his own” Shahid leapt to his feet. I could see I’d touched anerve“You think you’re so special and amazing? Tariq’s dead! And I killedhim!” I started laughing, Shahid used to always mess with me aschildren, and it was our unique way of bonding “You think I’m joking?I have a very short temper and I would’ve beheaded you a few minutesago but you’re my sister so I decided against it but that Tariq boyhas a lot of nerve. So I beheaded him” It wasn’t true, it justcouldn’t be. Nobody could be that evil. I looked at his face full ofanger, full of insanity and jumped up“Tariq!” I cried “Tariq!” I ran into the adjacent room looking forhim, shrieking his name as I scuttled through“There’s no use” A manic voice behind me said. “He can’t here youwhere he is”“What is your problem Shahid? Why did you take his life? How does hisdeath achieve Kashmiri independence?” Shahid had a response but I wastoo astonished to listen. Shivers ran down my back as I thought aboutit. I’d just sacrificed my fiancée for this madman? My legs could nolonger withstand my weight therefore I collapsed onto the floor. Notears came out because I’d drained them all as a child. My blemishedeyes closed for the last time.TranslationUrdu EnglishAllahGodAbuFatherAmmiMotherSalvar KameezIndian dressBhajiBig Sister