By looking closely at three different couples in 'Pride and Prejudice'explore what Jane Austen suggests is necessary for a successful marriage.

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By looking closely at three different couples in ‘Pride and Prejudice’ explore what Jane Austen suggests is necessary for a successful marriage.

‘Pride and Prejudice’ was written by Jane Austen in the early nineteenth century, when it was vital for women to marry well to safeguard their future. Unlike today every woman had to marry as there were not any chances for them to bring money to their family or to support themselves. For that reason marriage was a serious business, and it was a market in Jane Austen’s world. Therefore Jane Austen’s novels deal a lot with marriages, and her novels are very different from modern novels. As a matter of fact, sometimes it is very hard to appreciate them as life for women is very different today.

From what I know about Jane Austen, her life and her experiences are reflected a lot in her novels, especially in ‘Pride and Prejudice’: the Bennett family is just like Jane Austen’s family, Jane came from an upper middle-class family and she was one of seven children. I feel that Jane’s mother strongly resembles Mrs. Bennett in that they were both more practical than romantic, and more realistic than sensitive. They both are ambitious about their children’s marriages, accordingly their business is to ensure that their children to make economically good marriages. Also, I think that Jane’s own father is very similar to Mr. Bennett who is intelligent, well educated and witty.

Jane Austen was clever, well self-educated and confident like Elizabeth. She enjoyed writing and reading from a young age. Jane Austen wrote about what she knew as she had no interest in matters outside her own daily experience. Thus she hardly wrote anything about the political and economic chaos that spread throughout Europe during her lifetime. Jane Austen wrote about what she experienced or what she dreamed an upper-middle class marriage should be.

Austen, as her heroine Lizzy does, attended many balls, met many young handsome suitors. However, unlike all of her heroines, she did not make a successful marriage for herself after her failure with Tom Lefroy. Tom was a handsome suitor, who had good manners and was very agreeable. But he needed a financially secure marriage since he was in no position to support his wife. Therefore, he abandoned Jane and made a good marriage since she was not rich enough for him. This experience taught her that men are selfish and cannot be trusted. They will make decisions that will benefit them alone and have little concern for the feelings and hurt they may cause, which Austen shows through Wickham in ‘Pride and Prejudice’. Later in life, Jane Austen’s close neighbour Harris Bigg-Wither, who was five years younger than she was, proposed to Jane and Jane accepted; however she knew that it was not her ideal marriage. Therefore the next day Jane Austen broke off the engagement.

By understanding Jane Austen’s life, I realized what Jane Austen is trying to show and explain to readers what her ideal and successful marriage would be by focusing on many different marriages in ‘Pride and Prejudice’. I found three very interesting different type of marriage while I was reading the book; a marriage which is based on appearance and youth, a mercenary marriage and a marriage which involved mutual understanding. In this essay by discussing these three marriages I am going to define what Jane Austen considered a successful marriage.

Firstly, by looking at the Mr. and ...

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Firstly, by looking at the Mr. and Mrs. Bennet’s marriage the expressions that I can think of are ‘unhappy and unsuccessful’. Mr. Bennet fell in love with his wife’s ‘youth, beauty’, and an outward show of ‘good humour’. As a result when her beauty faded, he found Mrs. Bennet irritating, he even started to resent her strongly. Gradually, Mr. Bennet devoted his life to reading books in his library. Also because of his unhappy marriage, Mr. Bennet refuses to take his responsibility as a parent seriously and spends his whole time reading books. His irresponsibility shows when he allows his youngest daughter, who is only sixteen, to go to Brighton against Lizzy’s advice. Lizzy knew that if he doesn’t stop Lydia then the rest of the family would be humiliated by Lydia’s publicly embarrassing, poor behaviour. However, Mr. Bennet says ironically and carelessly: ‘what, has she frightened away some of your lovers?’ I think that Mr. Bennet is not doing his job properly as a father. Lizzy even mentions in the novel: ‘talents which, rightly used, might at least have preserved the respectability of his daughters, even if incapable of enlarging the mind of his wife’. Jane Austen through Lizzy giving her opinion that Mr. Bennet’s scornful, contemptuous attitude towards his wife is a harmful example to his children. She does not think an unhappy marriage excuses his irresponsibility as a father and his lack of marital loyalty, breakdown of respect within a family. Mr. Bennet just allows Lydia whatever she wants to do as he knows that Lydia will be fussing around and interrupting him reading books if he disagrees. Mr. Bennet refuses to take any real responsibility for his children, thinking that if he lets them work out their own salvation, everything will be for the best. In contrast, as much as he may dislike providing it, Lydia needs a firm hand and good direction. Also Mr. Bennet teases and mocks his children unlike his wife. He even said ‘they are all silly and ignorant, like other girls’, instead of guiding and loving his daughters. I believe that Jane Austen is trying to show and warn readers that a marriage based on passion and physical attraction just lasts until the beauty fades and she proves this in the union of Mr. and Mrs. Bennet who becomes very unhappy since there is no mutual understanding, esteem and gratitude. Jane Austen directly tells us that this marriage cannot have been successful or close, if twenty-three years has been ‘insufficient to make his wife understand his character’. This is a decidedly unsatisfactory union, and although a marriage of convenience (economic) is better, it is still not the answer.

Secondly, I am going to look at a practical marriage where a marriage is made because of money security. The main example of the mercenary marriage is the couple of Charlotte and Mr. Collins. It fact, this marriage does not involve any love, but Austen shows reader that the marriage was successful enough. Since Mr. Collins and Charlotte got what they both wanted to get. Charlotte is a ‘sensible, intelligent and realistic’ woman, who is pessimistic about finding a happy and romantic marriage. Jane Austen uses Charlotte to give her opinion to readers that a women like Charlotte who is practical, clear-sighted, and fully able to handle Collins and their marriage is better to choose financial marriage than end up being an old maid. Also in Jane Austen’s time, without financial stability, people literally starved to death, and the building of a family circle with a sound economic base was therefore very important. Therefore the Lucases are delighted and start to ‘speculate about Mr. Bennet’s death’, when their daughter will take possession of Lougbourn. Charlotte’s pessimistic view on marriage was clearly shown when Lizzy said that Jane does not yet know Bingley well enough to decide whether she is in love with him or not. Charlotte protests: ‘Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance’. Charlotte’s statement also shows that her chief concern is to obtain economic security; she believes that a marriage is successful as long as there is money. Jane Austen shows us that this mercenary or rather practical marriage was beneficial to Charlotte since she got a husband (Mr. Collins) who would provide financial security. After marriage at Hunsford, Charlotte seems quite satisfied with her choice as she doesn’t have to worry about financial problems at all. She cleverly arranges rooms and encourages Mr. Collins to work and exercise in his garden as much as possible. To ensure her own happiness, she contrives to put as much distance as she can put between herself and Mr. Collins, thus proving that love does not feature in the marriage.

Mr. Collins as his part has married his wife for truly selfish reasons. Miss de Bourgh has recommended that he marry a gentlewoman for her sake, and for his sake a woman, who is active, useful and not brought up demanding but who is able to make a small income go for. Secondly, as a clergyman he thinks that it is right thing for him to set a good example of matrimony. Lastly, he thinks that marriage will add to his happiness. As a result Jane Austen tries to show us that the marriage was a successful since Charlotte got a husband who would provide her with financial security and Mr. Collins got a wife in accordance with Miss de Bourgh’s will. By the end of the novel the couple is expecting a child, fulfilling the purpose of this kind of marriage and offering the couple an established place in society which shows Austen’s degree of contentment with the financial marriage.

The union between Mr. Darcy and Lizzy results in a compromise on both their parts ; to Mr. Darcy must overcome his pride and Lizzy must free herself of prejudice in order to realize their love. Both Mr. Darcy and Lizzy alter enormously, and they both learn lessons about their own character deficiencies. They learn a great deal about each other and learn to respect each others and their respective and estimable qualities. Jane Austen illustrates that much good will result from such a union.

Elizabeth and Darcy’s marriage is an ideal and model marriage for Jane Austen. Their relationship is ‘rationally founded’, based on ‘excellent understanding’ and ‘general similarity of taste’. Austen through the character of Darcy and Lizzy shows that by going through painful times, the marriage and love become deeper and more valuable. They help each other to mature by casting aside their main faults of pride and prejudice through their relationship with each other. Darcy had prejudice of Lizzy’s lack of connections and this led him to influence Bingley away from Jane and to resist his own affection for Elizabeth. Darcy thought that Jane loves Bingely and he prevented his friend from an ill-advised marriage. It is only when Lizzy points out his pride in the proposal that he realizes how it has clouded the ‘impartial conviction’ he considers he has. It is turning point for Darcy; he makes an honest effort to see clearly and to change his behaviour to reflect this. At the end, he respects and esteems Lizzy and sees only the true Lizzy, not her social connection.

Lizzy also turn her against him when he snubs her when they first meet. From then on, instead of attempting to understand Darcy, she reacts only to his proud outer appearance. That is why Lizzy was willing to believe Wickham’s whole story about Darcy. She later admits, ‘out of her senses’, not thinking clearly she accepts almost unquestioningly everything Wickham says about the Darcy family. At first, she states that she had not thought Darcy ‘so bad as this’, but later she is finding evidence of her own to support Wickham’s claims, and she is soon sure about the truth of his words. At a strategic point, Darcy declares his love towards Lizzy. However, she refuses him with the illustration that he ruined her dearest sister’s happiness, and also because of his mistreatment for Wickham. Lizzy later on considers Darcy’s letter, is a careful account of how her prejudice is overcome. At first, she is biased against Darcy, without ‘any wish of doing him justice’, she then realize that she has deceived herself. Lizzy admits to being ‘blind, partial, and prejudiced’ and also she begins to comprehend Darcy’s criticisms of her family, seeing them objectively possibly. At last, she comes to appreciate the justification of their union, just like Darcy has overcome his prejudice. Jane Austen clearly tell us through the union of Darcy and Elizabeth that by going through harsh and hard times, they change and they learn about each other so their mutual knowledge grows, their respect grows and their esteem grows and these make their marriage ideal.

By looking at these three different marriages, I am certain that Jane Austen does not approve of a marriage based on ‘youth and beauty’ as she shows us the bad consequences of Mr. and Mrs. Bennet’s and Lydia and Wickham’s marriages. I think that a mercenary marriage may be successful in that a selfish husband and wife will achieve what they want. I think that Charlotte has ‘a degree of contentment’. But I don’t believe that Jane Austen’s ideal marriage is a mercenary marriage because she values esteem, respect, money, honesty and love to be vital for a successful marriage. As a matter of fact, it is because Jane Austen in her own life rescued herself from choosing a practical marriage with Harris Bigg-Wither. I believe that Lizzy and Mr.Dary’s marriage was the successful marriage in Jane Austen’s view since they mapped out each others’ faults, understood each other’s behaviour and reached a true understanding: the strongest love, combined with everlasting esteem and respect.

Bibliography

York notes advanced

Penguin study notes

BBC baptized

E – Notes

Jane Austen