Compare the attitudes to marriage displayed in the world of Jane Austen in Pride and Prejudice with those displayed in your world today.
Compare the attitudes to marriage displayed in the world of Jane Austen in Pride and Prejudice with those displayed in your world today.
In this essay I'm going to compare the attitudes to marriage during the life of Jane Austen as shown in her novel, Pride and Prejudice with that of a Sri-Lankan Muslim society today.
Marriage during the time of Jane Austen was very important. The whole novel, Pride and Prejudice revolves around the type of life the gentry had and how they socialised. The first line of the novel is " It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of good fortune, must be in want of a wife". This line immediately shows the reader the importance of marriage during the 18th century. Mrs. Bennet's behaviour shows the reader that the main role of a mother was to get her daughter's married, which is what Mrs Bennet tries very hard to do.
In Muslim society today, this same importance towards marriage is shown, partly for social reasons but mainly for religious reasons. In the Quran it says, "Whoever is able to marry, let him marry...". Also, Muslims see marriage as important for two people because it provides companionship, and it provides a secure environment for bringing up children.
This is a similar attitude to what the Bennet's had. They ended up with five children, all girls.
In Jane Austen's society we don't see religion as being a key factor for marriage but social and financial standing and improvement. We see the importance of financial standings in the marriage between Charlotte Lucas and Mr. Collins. Charlotte does not marry Mr. Collins for his character and liking for him but instead for her best interests and her future. She knows that she will not receive much money from her father when she gets married and will receive very little when her father dies and so she sees that Mr. Collins is going to inherit the Bennets' estate when Mr. Bennet dies because of the entailment laws. Charlotte realizes that this inheritance will enable her to live her life comfortably.
We also see that some people viewed marriage as a way of improving connections. Lady Catherine de Bourg shows this sort of attitude when she speaks to Elizabeth against marrying Darcy when she says "you will be... despised, by every one connected with him. Your alliance will be a disgrace".
Husbands for daughters of people from the gentry were chosen very carefully. There woman. There were many criteria to be met before a marriage took place between a man and a the biggest concerns for parents when giving their daughter to man was to see if he was wealthy enough to support their daughter. In Pride and Prejudice this is seen when all the women at the first ball are in awe of Mr Bingley when they hear that he receives five thousand pounds a year. The women are even more shocked when they hear the Mr. Darcy receives ten thousand pounds a year. Jane Austen writes "Mr Darcy soon drew the attention of the room...and the report...was in general circulation within five minutes of his entrance, of his having ten thousand a year".
During the 18th Century husbands were chosen for daughters not through the direct influence of the parents but the parents would take them to parties and balls in the hope that daughters would meet an eligible man of the same social standing that they enjoyed the company of.
Today, in the Muslim society, marriage is usually arranged by the parents as there are not many social events that young men and women can attend together because most Muslims believe it's not correct for young men and women to mix freely and dating is discouraged.
After ...
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During the 18th Century husbands were chosen for daughters not through the direct influence of the parents but the parents would take them to parties and balls in the hope that daughters would meet an eligible man of the same social standing that they enjoyed the company of.
Today, in the Muslim society, marriage is usually arranged by the parents as there are not many social events that young men and women can attend together because most Muslims believe it's not correct for young men and women to mix freely and dating is discouraged.
After reading Pride and Prejudice the reader gets the feeling that parents at the time didn't really look to see their daughters best interests. Mrs Bennett tells Mr. Collins that she doesn't "know of any prepossession" of her younger daughters and that they are available. She doesn't mind that Mr. Collins was lazy at university and came from a narrow background. It was almost as though she would rather have something to boast about to her neighbours than her daughters' happiness.
Today, however, parents are very involved in a marriage because usually a man proposes to someone his parents think is suitable, and since he doesn't know the girl personally the proposal would be sent to the girls' parents who would then enquire about the man and ask their daughter if she wanted to marry him. The proposal will either be agreed upon or turned down depending on what the girl wants to do.
At the time of Jane Austen there was parental supervision during the parties and balls, so young men and women were not left alone together. This sort of mingling gave them a chance to get together and get to know each while the parents were making sure that they were not doing any thing wrong or socially unacceptable.
Proposals in the 18th Century were very different to the type of proposals in a Muslim society now. At the time it was common knowledge to people if two people were going to get married because of their behaviour around each other. This is shown in Pride and Prejudice, because Mrs. Bennett know Jane is going to get engaged to Mr. Bingley because she says "her eldest daughter...was likely to be very soon engaged" and we see that she is right in saying this because it does actually happen in Volume 3, Chapter 13, much later than she had expected.
We learn that proposals were done in private, without anyone around, and it was the responsibility of the family to grant both people the privacy in which to do it in. This is shown in the same chapter where Mrs. Bennett tries in vain to get everyone to leave the room, so Bingley and Jane could be together alone, giving him an opportunity to propose. "Mrs Bennet say looking and winking to Elizabeth and Catherine for a considerable time" and then "she suddenly got up" and "took her (Catherine) out of the room" and "in a few minutes...Elizabeth was forced to go" because her mother was calling her. This left Jane and Bingley alone.
We also see that it was necessary for the man to ask permission from the ladies father before being able to marry her. We see this when Darcy proposes to Elizabeth. Straight after she accepts his proposal he goes in to see Mr. Bennett to get his approval.
The parents' approval is still important today, in the Muslim society, because parents are highly respected and Muslims believe that parents should be able to guide their children because they know what's best for them.
During Jane Austen's time, we don't see that there is a certain age that women should be getting married at, but we do see that it wouldn't be possible for a lady to get married after the age of about because we see that Charlotte Lucas doesn't want to become an old maid, so she gets married to Mr. Collins. On the other hand Lydia gets married at 16, which at the time was thought of as not totally wrong but still young.
Today, the average age for a girl to get married at is about 18 to 23, quite similar to the time of Pride and Prejudice, however it is possible to girls to get married later or even earlier, depending on what they want to do and their parents wishes. There are now laws in most countries of the world, where people under the age of 16 cannot get married legally.
Elopement during the time of Jane Austen was seen a very shameful thing to do. In the novel, Lydia elopes with Mr.Wickham. When Mr.Collins finds out he says, "the death of your daughter would have been a blessing compared tot his." His statement shows the complete attitude towards elopement in the 18th century.
In the Muslim society today, elopement would bee seen in the same manner as it was then. It brings great shame on the family. The actual marriage would not be wrong or illegal but the fact that the woman managed to meet a man and go out with him would be shameful and wrong. If, she had lived with him before the marriage, as Lydia did, many people would feel the same as Mr. Collins did in the novel, that it would have been better that the daughter had died. This sort of prejudice is not shown towards the men of today's society because it is generally more acceptable if the girl marries within the society whereas; it is acceptable for the man to marry outside. That is why it is seen a worse for a girl to elope than it is for a man to elope.
Another important point that Jane Austen makes in the novel is the fact that gentry had to marry gentry. She shows this in the novel when Elizabeth says, "he is a gentleman and I am a gentleman's daughter and we are equal." She says this to Lady Catherine De Bough when she objects to Elizabeth marrying Darcy. Elizabeth is trying to show that she is of the same class as Darcy and so she has the right to marry him.
In today's Muslim society the element of class is present when it comes to marriage. Parents do not want their daughters to be married to someone who wouldn't be able to support her lifestyle that she had before marriage. In the same way, parents would not want their son marrying a girl who would not be able to uphold their families' appearance and status suitably in public.
Jane Austen shows many different types of marriage, in the novel Pride and Prejudice.
I think that marriage is one of the most important themes in her book. I get this feeling by her opening sentence where she begins her book by saying "It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife".
The first marriage we see in the novel is the marriage between Mr and Mrs Bennet. We see that their marriage is not a very successful one and Mr Bennet only attracted to the first impressions of Mrs Bennet, but now has lost his affection for her because of her reduced amount of wit etc.
Looking at society and its attitudes to marriage today we know that a marriage like Mr and Mrs Bennets' would never last because now it is socially acceptable for most people to have a divorce and get separated, but it is frowned upon in many societies especially because of religion. In the Quran it says, "divorce is the most hateful in the sight of Allah" (god).
I think Jane Austen is pointing out the dangers of marriage without love and mutual understanding of each other when referring to the Bennets' marriage. We know that Mr Bennett was "captivated by youth and beauty and that appearance of good humour...had married a woman whose weak understanding and illiberal mind, had very early in their marriage put an end to all real affection for her. Respect, esteem and confidence had vanished forever; and all his views of domestic happiness were overthrown".
During her time, Jane Austen never married and this may have been to prove that women didn't have to marry to live successfully because she lived of the incomes of her books.
The second marriage in the book is between Charlotte Lucas, a close friend of Elizabeth's and Mr Collins, Mr Bennets nephew. This marriage is totally different to the kind of marriage the Bennets had. Charlotte marries Mr Collin, a disgusting and obsequious man for practicality not because she was in love with him. She is "not a romantic" but is very sensible because she knows that after her father dies she will not have much of an inheritance because she has so many siblings. She realizes that the Bennetts' estate is entailed to Mr Collins because he is the closest male relative the Bennets have. She realizes that she will be taken care of if she marries Mr Collins. Charlotte's acceptance of Mr Collins' proposal shocks Elizabeth who turned him down, however she does realize that what Charlotte is doing is sensible.
Elizabeth's marriage is totally different to Charlottes. A mutual feeling of understanding and respect is created between Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy before they get married. Elizabeth first met Mr. Darcy at a ball because his friend, Mr. Bingley, had brought him along. At first, he seemed haughty and rude, but soon Elizabeth realized that she had misjudged him. After many months, she realized that she did respect and love him. Over the months, he learnt Elizabeth's faults and strengths and she learnt his weaknesses and qualities.
In the Muslim society today, a marriage like this, one based on mutual love and respect, would be highly unlikely because dating and going out with men is highly discouraged.
Jane Austen's novel, Pride and Prejudice, is a very universal novel, in that people are so predictable and her society's ideas and conduct are very similar to those of today. Her novel is able to match any society at anytime. There have and always will b unwritten rules on how people in the society should behave and what things are acceptable and what is not. Marriage is a very universal concept and it shows us that people will always be very similar in what they think. This is seen especially well in the novel when it is compared to today's world. Although, the two society's, Jane Austen's and the Muslim, will never be it but we are able to notice very many similarities between the two. Since Pride and Prejudice is a novel based on society and its attitudes it will always be a very universal book.
