It's ok to cry!
I waited for the screaming to stop. I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck bristling with fear. Beads of sweat trickled down my back as I realised with relief ... it was my little sister in the other room, frightened, she had a bad dream or something. I opened my door. Everything was a blur but I could vaguely see my sister standing there hoping I would let her sleep in my room tonight. 'Come on then jess' I said, reluctantly. She jumped into my bed and I came in afterwards.
'Wake up wake up, its your birthday'. Jess shouted at the top of her voice, waking me up. What I don't understand about birthdays and what they tell you is that when you're fourteen you're also 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 and one and when you wake up on your fourteenth birthday you expect to feel fourteen but you don't. You open your eyes and everything is like yesterday, only it's today.
Jess and I live with uncle Rick and auntie Sandra in a beautiful cottage near the Lake District. Our father is in the army; we wait patiently for his homecoming. My mother is in hospital dying of Leukaemia in England. I rarely se her, money is tight in the village that we live in and the cost to go all the way to London is very dear. I pray for my mother every night for her to get well but it would be a miracle if she would.
Sandra was preparing snacks and treats for my party. I was home schooled so I had few friends, if any at all. Rick was at the old country pub drinking his life away while Sandra was doing all the work but I'm not in the position to say anything.
Nan and granddad were the 1st to arrive. They lived in London so why did they come all the way here just for my birthday. Well, I don't think I have met them before. Shouldn't they be worrying about mother rather than my stupid birthday? Oh well they're here and it looks like they're going to be staying a while.
Everyone is here now gram Mazy has come with her four children Sarah, Mary, Jane and Lola. Who invited them? God knows!
All the villagers call Mazy they're gram because, whenever there's no money or food ...
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Nan and granddad were the 1st to arrive. They lived in London so why did they come all the way here just for my birthday. Well, I don't think I have met them before. Shouldn't they be worrying about mother rather than my stupid birthday? Oh well they're here and it looks like they're going to be staying a while.
Everyone is here now gram Mazy has come with her four children Sarah, Mary, Jane and Lola. Who invited them? God knows!
All the villagers call Mazy they're gram because, whenever there's no money or food she would be there to help care for whoever needed it, like your own gram would.
Most of the village children had come including a very large boy called John I guess he was just here for the food and cake.
'Thank you for the lovely party but I must get back to doing some school work Sandra' I eagerly said wanting to get away from all of Ricks drunken friends. 'No work today presents must be opened.'
To Tim from nanny,' a quite small parcel said on the top. I opened it; it was a set of army soldiers. I stared at them trying to hold my tears back but I let go. My tears ran down my face onto the two soldiers
'What's the matter, don't you like my present?'
'No. I love it, I really do' I sobbed
Everyone has left for their homes and I sit here near the burning fire thinking, thing of my mum, not knowing if she's okay and my father, he could be stuck in Germany or France or he could be coming home right now, how jess and I miss him, but we both know it wont be long now.
Five years past, I am nineteen now and still I feel eighteen. My uncle died shortly after my mothers' death, too much alcohol I guess, and his funeral will take place later on today. Sandra keeps her tears from us by hiding in her hair.I took her by the hand and I said. 'It's okay to cry' she smiled and let all her emotions out of her system.
I'm expected to marry once I turn twenty if I don't marry a wife will be chosen for me, I refuse to marry any of gram mazy overgrown self-centred little brats so I must find my bride. Sandra says the right young lady will come along soon, but I'm tired of waiting. Sandra, Jess and I go to church now. Sandra says I must look somewhere and church can be the perfect place.
Weeks go by and still no bride. I don't class myself as being an ugly boy but maybe I need to improve my appearance. I need to shave, but I might cut myself. I took a long walk to the village town barber.
'Ah yes, how may I help you young ser?' the barber said in his husky Scottish accent welcoming me in.
'Well, I want to clean and quite intelligent I guess' I loudly replied. The barber got to work.
I came out looking pretty handsome. Now I needed some sweet corn from the groceries for Sandra's corn chowder she would make that evening. I got lost on the way there but I saw a nearby farm so I went in to ask anyone for some directions.
A young girl was weaving in one corner and a grumpy man in another was milking a cow.
'How dare you intrude on my property' the farmer scolded,'
'I'm sorry sir, I just got lost on my way to town, ill go now' I said alarmed
'Hey wait I was just on my way out,' a voice called out 'let me give you a ride.'
The girl took me by the hand before her father or I could stop her. I rode horseback with her in front. I could smell her hair distinctly of flowers or herbs. When we arrived she tied her horse to a pole and she showed me around without me asking. We talked for a long time about family and friends and herbs, don't ask, until we came to the grocers shop. We sat on a bench outside just talking until I said
'You're beautiful, Kate.' That was her name
'What?' she questioned.
'Oh hem err nothing.' I gathered myself. She laughed a small laugh. When I got the corn I needed, she had to leave.
'When will I see you again?' She asked
'Church' I said, smiling
'What took you so long?' Jess questioned me angrily. 'I'm starving'
Sunday became the worst to the best day of the week, because I saw Kate then, because we both went to church, well, I guess we did, it was our meeting point every Sunday and from there we went from picking berries in the forest to swimming in the freezing lake, we were quite close for several months but after that she told me her father had arranged her to marriage to John Robinson, the fat boy who lived by the gardens, I felt sick, a feeling I never felt before.
The next morning I went to Kate crying I told her I loved her and that she shouldn't marry John.
'Well whom should I marry, he spoke to my father and it is settled, sorry Timmy' she said.
I said nothing knowing that whatever I would wouldn't help or do anything to the situation so I just turned away and strolled home.
SLAM, went the farm door. 'It's unfair father, why must I marry someone I barely even know, you hated Tim from the start but oh no you don't dare think about how I feel about him, I refuse to marry john no matter what.'
Yes she married me on my twentieth birthday exactly. It was when we were saying our vows he came.
There was a loud thud on the church door and the priest nodded for the door to be opened. A tall middle-aged man stepped inside, he came at last, Jess and I ran to him and gripped hold of him tight by now Sandra was clapping and soon everyone in the church was clapping as well.
Jess and I tried holding our tears back but our father told us
'It's okay to cry'
By Dana Harris 10 J