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Diary 1984

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O'Brien's Diary Denise Taylor April 25th 1984 19.00 hours This will be the final chapter in my diary as I am nearing the completion of my life's work. I hope whoever reads this will now understand and that it will answer any unanswered questions; this is the final piece in the jigsaw. I am finally alone again, they have left and I have realised that I've done it! Step two is complete; 6079 Smith. W. is now mine for the taking. The trap that I have placed so carefully has now snapped shut and my victim is ripe for the picking. He is even more gullible than I had first thought. I cannot believe that he brought along his female co-conspirator comrade Julia. I don't know who is more stupid, him or her! I now have the added bonus of destroying her as well. When she said that they would not betray each other I knew that she was his 'Achilles heel' and losing her will hurt him as much as anything I can do to him. I haven't felt this excited for years. Now I am nearing the end of my quest I keep thinking back to what started all this; what lit the fire in my belly. When I reminisce I realise it started with the feelings I had when I was young; my father would continually enjoy telling me over and over again that I would amount to nothing. ...read more.


I could smell the nervousness seeping out of every pore in his body as strongly as the vile Victory Gin on his breath and it was crystal clear that he was more scared than I was. I don't mind admitting that I didn't think that it would be so easy. I knew I held all the winning cards as they both sat here tonight in awe of my greatness, hanging on every word I uttered, breathing in my power, drinking in the sumptuousness of the wealth and luxury of my surroundings. -2- Denise Taylor I haven't seen him for 20 years but he hasn't changed. He isn't as big as I remembered him and although I am only a year older than him in age, he looks a lot older than me. Despite the years that have passed, the face I was looking at is still the same that has haunted my nightmares. The whining voice is still the same; I can still hear him making up the lies that would get me into trouble whilst getting himself in the good books of my bully of a father. The thin-lipped mouth is still the same one I used to see smirking as I cowered in a corner trying to avoid the blows of the leather belt raining down on me. ...read more.


The world I planned in my head allowed me to escape from my miserable existence where nobody would ever hurt me again by making me feel small and unwanted. I am sure that the irony of the name will not pass Winston by as I lead him to Room 101 and disclose the truth to him as I did to my other brothers in the very same room last month. It is just a shame that my father died naturally before I could show him how far I have come. Finally it has come full circle, I truly am Winston's 'Big Brother' in every sense of the word and I will ensure that he will remember this for the rest of his miserable existence. As I apply the electric current through his body I will describe to him the small runt of his 'family'. The same runt who had been the butt of his jokes; the same runt who endured the torment he had seemed to enjoy delivering alongside his adoptive father and brothers. I will stand him in front of the mirror to look at his pathetic body and finally he will realise that I was that small runt! I cannot wait to see the expression on his face when the penny finally drops. I know that the day he walked into our house as an orphan boy and chose their side will become one day that he will never forget and one he will always regret. ...read more.

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