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Don't get me started on the X-factor!

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Introduction

Don't Get Me Started On...! A review of The X Factor (ITV) So....The X Factor is back on our TV screens yet again, for our Saturday night viewing pleasure. Or is it pain I wonder? Back with the same old format of pervious series, we yet again have to sit through three million, OK possibly a slight exaggeration, of the most terrible performances from people who know somewhere deep down that they should JUST NOT DO IT! All to find one or two possible gems, for "Simon" to put up for sale in the Christmas chart battle. Let's not forget about poor Dermot O'Leary. After months of trailing up and down the country through the auditions process, interviewing one nutter after another, it's a wonder he has not ended up as ga-ga as most of the contestants! ...read more.

Middle

Oh let the battle of the most designer frock, the most sparkling gems and the highest hair-do commence. Are they really that interested in the acts, or just the status of Queen Bee? Finally the auditions are over, and phew, we can relax now as it is talent only now we are on to the boot camp stage, apparently. So, yes you guessed it, we watch them perform all over again and find that yes, the contestants are still as rubbish as they were at the auditions, and yes, yet again we are reminded that little Jamie deserves to win because he lost his magic pet goldfish, lovingly remembered as Goldie in a freak drowning accident. Cue the Westlife music and.....You raise me up...! ...read more.

Conclusion

Ballet lessons required? Repeat: Jamie just jive, Jamie just jive! Yeah baby. And Dermot appears on stage. He has the results (feel the tension folks will I drag this out as long as possible and cue that dramatic music, whilst we all wait, and wait and wait). And the glorious moment is here! Oh, no. That would be the adverts. Again. Wait! We're back and still waiting. Is Dermot's ear piece broken, a technical problem? No just the producers in the wings like evil controlling monsters of show biz. AND THE WINNER IS....JAMIE!!!! (I bet Goldie is smiling down from that big fishbowl in the sky) There are cheers, applause, tears, tissue things raining down... a day that will surely go down in history. Not. Or, is Simon really the winner. I wonder? ?? ?? ?? ?? ...read more.

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