The arrival of the presents brings Alvi to imagine and to have a flash back, to see her grandmother and Aunt in ‘Shaded rooms’. Alvi uses bright colours to describe the gifts from her Aunts, ‘glistening like an orange split open’. This describes the ‘Salwar kameez’ given to her. The colours and imagery give the reader a sense of splendour in contrast with the plain ‘cardigans from Marks and Spencers’. Also the presents from my Aunts also mirror how she feels mentally about the Pakistan culture. ‘Candy-striped glass bangles snapped, drew blood’. Initially they appear beautiful, but they break to reveal themselves to have another less perfect side.
Throughout the poem, it is clear that the Alvi has no clear sense of identity. ‘I admired the mirror work, tired to glimpse myself in the miniature glass cycles’. Here, she is desperately trying to capture a real image of her nationality and who she really is.
The central message is that she feels out of place, feels isolated, ‘Of no fixed nationality’s’. She feels that she’s alienated. The use of similes and alliteration are placed all over the poem.
The shape of the poem reflex’s the poet’s conflicting thoughts by setting out each line differently, gives an impression of a wave effect. She’s trying to match the two different cultures together. She explains her ‘memories’, we get a feeling that her memories are like a flash bulb, flashing on and off, of her thinking back to her grandmother and her salwar kameez in the wardrobe. A contrast between the two.
Aunt Jamila sends her salwar kameez’s, which changes how she thinks. She wishes that her aunt would stop sending but still thinks and likes those salwar kameez. She suggested that the clothes are too special and don’t fit in, clothes let her down, she wishes ‘for denim and corduroy’.
The poet’s attitudes towards her presents at the end of the poem are positive and negative. Positive feelings are that she admires the clothes, and wants to know about her past by the photo’s she has and the presents her aunt has given her. She imagined her grandmother and aunt with salwar kameez in shaded rooms. A negative is that she feels uncomfortable, wants to be part of the western world. Trapped and can not get out and explore each culture in her own way, desperately trying to marry the two cultures together. Feeling very ambivalent, feeling two. Trying to fit in, but wants to be different, as she is a unique person. Fitting in here but ‘torn apart’ same as everything else.
