How does Wilfred Owen use language and structure to explain the physical and mental effects of war on soldiers in 'Mental Cases', and 'Disabled'?

Review of essay

Rating: 4 star(s)

Response to the question

This answer is a very well focused response to a question orientating around the exploration of physical and mental torture of innocent soldiers as shown by Wilfred Owen's use of language and structure in his poems 'Mental Cases' and 'Disabled', though it could be argued that there is a very large bias towards the analysis of 'Mental Cases' and comparatively very little on 'Disabled'. This shows that, whilst the analysis on 'Mental Cases' is great and the candidate won't be penalised for it, there is a slight digression from the steer of the question and therefore the candidate loses marks not for where they over-comment on 'Mental Cases', but where they do not comment on 'Disabled'. It is important that a balance is maintained, particularly in essays like this, which as for two aspects of analysis from two different poems.

Level of analysis

The Level of Analysis shown starts of very well, and makes a good point commenting on the poetic devices Owen uses in 'Mental Cases'. Later on, there is only a brief mention of 'Disabled' and then the candidate reverts back to being focused on 'Mental Cases'. This is by no means bad, but it does not satisfy the question, which required a balanced answer.
The depth of analysis shown is entirely indicative of a strong B grade candidate for GCSE. A few moments could see a better use of terminology such as "syllabic rhythm" and "rhyme scheme" when referring to how the stanza lengths are disjointed and very irregular. The candidate does very well though, to realise that this is representative of the fragmentation of psychosis - something the soldiers were subjected to.
The language analysis of 'Mental Cases' is a very strong A grade response on it's own, but it is let down by a lesser focus on the structure of both poems and the language analysis of 'Disabled'. I like would've liked to have also seen more depth at certain points, for instance, what is the real effect of assonance with "batter" and "shatter". The internal rhyme draws the attention immediately to it, and in a poem full of irregular, disjointed rhythm and rhyme, it sticks out prominently and the gruesome imagery of "flying muscles" blown apart from their bodies also stays with the reader.

Quality of writing

The Quality of Written Communication is average. There is a good use of the English language to explain the candidate's answer and there are no moments where the clarity of written expression is compromised by a poor misuse of English.