The poet explains that the “insidious mastery of song” triggers his memory back to the past “In spite of himself…down in the flood of remembrance”. Incompatible to what he thinks or wishes, whenever he hears the music he has no resistance against looking back. The music / song usually is a simple beautiful element which brings relaxation and happiness in peoples thoughts, but sometimes can become a very powerful element of one’s memory, which hides a very powerful and cruel, irresistible and unstoppable strength. The fact that the song “Betrays him back”, suggests that he doesn’t wish to remember those days. Remembering the past is not a pleasant thing for some, especially when the past is better than the present. Because the past was such an delightful time full of warmth and caring from his mother, the fact that he cannot go back and experience those times again makes him feel sad, hurting him even more. “Till the heart of me weeps to belong…weep like a child for the past”. He misses those times very much and the poet’s emotions of desperately wanting to be back there can be captured very strongly. The poet uses phrases such as “cosy parlour”, “tinkling piano”, “glamour of childish days” describing a past that has been perfect full of joy and devotion. However, immediately after these positive description the poet gives a solid statement that his “manhood is cast”, showing that he is forced to accept that he can no longer return to those days and face the harsh reality awaiting, which is very effective and makes the reader feel sorry about him. “So know it is vain for the singer to burst into clamour” can be read metaphorically, that now nothing can take him back to those days, the tune he hears no longer contains the insidious mastery, it is now simply a unpleasant noise for him which seals the only path to his past. In the same way that D.H Lawernce looks back fondly and accepts the harsh reality he must face, so does Thomas Hardy in “At Castle Boterel”.
Unlike the ‘Piano’, ‘At Castle Boterel’ opens with a dismal image of the poet driving down the highway, which metaphorically could be seen as the poet meandering through the labyrinth between life and death. The word “drizzle” is used to suggest the gloomy, somber atmosphere seen in the present day by the poet. As he approaches the junction he “look behind at the fading by way”, explaining to us that this is the trigger to his past where he describes the time being “glistening wet”, “dry march weather” suggesting a sparkling, positive atmosphere. Also the drizzling, raining weather can be seen metaphorically as a curtain drawn between the present and past, splitting them apart. A junction is a split point where some thing change, also where a decision must be made, therefore this can be read metaphorically that one lane leads to continue with the present, one lane goes back to the past and that the poet must make a decision and decide which path to take. The poet crosses the boundary of present and past, where himself and a “girlish figure benighted” meet. This suggests that this person is the core of his memory and is a very important person for him. It is suggested that they both have a considerate, kind personality and the two “just alighting / To ease the pony’s load” furthers the idea of the two being warm hearted and cares for others. The continuous use of “we”, “we climbed...we had...we talked” expresses to the reader the inclination of wanting to be with her, to spend time together furthering the idea that this person is the most important one in his memory. The poet uses constant positive phrases like “until hope is dead”, “feeling fled”. At this moment he is so happy thinking that this happiness with her will be eternal and the thought of misery waiting for him in the future is completely unimaginable for him.
The second stanza is very optimistic, “was there ever a time of such quality, since or before, in that hill’s story? / Though it has been climbed, foot swift, foot sore, by thousands more”. This can be read metaphorically as the hill representing life, and many others like the poet have experienced this situation.. Also it can be seen that sharing time on hill together is sharing life together. Even though the poet knows that many others have climbed over the hill, he feels so pleased and wonderful, furthering the idea of this moment being a very special time where the poet feels most delighted. Then, after all these glamorous experiences the poet suddenly make these positive image vanish and brings himself back to the harsh reality. The time is felt as though it has not moved “though Time’s unflinching rigour” and although it “has ruled from sight”, he knows that those wonderful memories will “remain on the slope…as one phantom figure” forever, just like “that night” which saw them “alight”. But now, the memory is “shrinking, shrinking” showing that the memories are slowly fading and disappearing into oblivion. The last stanza is described in a very cruel way, where the poet accepts the fact that he cannot go back to those days ever again and is forced to face the oppressive reality. The poem closes with a very pitiless ending which is very effective, where he realizes that he is getting close to an end of his life “my sand is sinking” whilst he also feels sad that he will never be able to experience the “old love’s domain, Never Again”.
“My grandmother” opens with a dark mysterious atmosphere in the antique shop of Jennings grandmother. From the start the readers are given hints and suggestions that this grandmother is possibly grumpy and nasty and that she has lived a boring miserable childhood and life, just polishing antiques everyday. She seems not to care about having anyone to talk to, but as the poem goes on the reader discovers that she hides a great loneliness and really wishes someone to take care of her. The phrase the poet uses, “She kept an antique shop – or it kept her”, can just simply mean that it was an element which kept her going, i.e. business to earn livings or it can be read metaphorically as the grandmother being drawn to these object of virtue becoming soulless, unable to see the world around, possibly suggesting a slight madness. The poet uses words such as “faded”, “heavy” to describe the antique objects furthering the idea of the dark, peculiar and unusual atmosphere present in the shop. The grandmother is lonely, and she “watched her own reflection in the brass…as if to prove, polish was all” which supports the idea of vainness and the unhappy feelings she hides in her mind and her hard headed character, not admitting that she is lonely. Also this can be read in another way that in order to hide those inner feelings, she put tremendous effort into these antiques to make them look shiny and as best as possible hoping that one day they will repay the favour by helping her out in the future keeping her company. But all the antiques do is just give back “her own reflection in the brass”. It is like the grandmother has been abandoned by her own precious objects. This is very effective making the reader feel sorry for her.
However carries on being big headed, and insists that “there was no need of love”. This suggests the that she wasn’t very close or didn’t have a strong relationship with the poet Jennings. Although once she couldn’t bare it anymore and expressed her lonely feeling to her grand daughter. But her granddaughter refuses “to go out with her”, since her grand daughter “was afraid” to be used like antique objects just being shown to everyone. Now that she has been refused, the grandmother was completely lost and she knew very well that there was no longer anything “to give her own reflection back again” showing that there was no hope of sharing time with anyone anymore, or no hope of sharing the experiences with them ever again. She places “all her best things in one long narrow room”, like a road of her memory. Although she is old and has been through a long life, the variety and types of antiques i.e. her emotions, are small and limited. “The place smelt old, of things too long kept shut” furthers the idea of her not sharing her memories and past with anyone else before.
The poets strong self consciousness and her regretful feelings can be captured in the stanza, where her grandmother “died” and she felt “only the guilt of what she once refused”. The poet missed the first and last chance to build a relation with her grandmother. The phrase “she felt no grief at all” supports the idea of the two not being very close. When Jennings entered into her grandmothers room, “among the sideboards and cupboards” there were only a few “things she never used but needed”. The almost empty room can represent the grandmothers mind, where there were rooms for plenty of enjoyable times and wonderful memories to be stored, although she missed all of the opportunities just like left over antiques which missed their chances to be bought. Only a few memories were stored in her mind but even those had “no finger-marks”. This could be seen as a simple memory which isn’t important just like some antiques which are kept shiny to have a good appearance, although it doesn’t have any true value and are worthless. But the poet cleverly finishes off with the room being empty and having “only the new dust falling through the air”. The new dust falling through the air can represent a new path, a brand new hope for the poet to live a lovely life full of opportunities. This maybe seen metaphorically as the grandmother preparing the path for her, expressing her hidden caring feelings towards the grand daughter and an advise telling her not to make the same mistake as her.
I enjoyed the poem ‘Piano’ the most out of the three poems about ‘looking back’. It was the poem which I thought contained the most positive images, and the way the poet used the piano as a protective figure was very interesting. I know that the piano is a very large instrument which accompanies other instrument in music pieces, which enabled me to see it as a gigantic figure which protected and supported the child all through its childhood, where as the tune it plays could be seen as a voice of encouragement. Also the poem had a rhyme pattern of AABB, a regular rhyme pattern which represents the continuous even flow of musical sound representing the tuneful balance of his childhood. Generally the poem was full of opportunities for me to use my imagination, which enabled me to engage with the text and understand the poem much more better than the other two.