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Pride and Prejudice.

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English coursework - Pride and Prejudice TheParsonage Rosings Park Dear Diary, I am so confused and wound up in recent affairs that I can hardly think clearly.Firstly, Darcy proposed to me declaring feelings of love yet he spoke just as well about his personal pride, though after Mr Collins' pompous and formal proposal, Darcy's was refreshing to the ear. Collins only wanted a convenient marriage whilst Darcy declared his ardent love for me. I was, no doubt, astonished by his actions and could not believe how such a proud, arrogant and conceited man could have expected me to accept his hand in marriage. His shameful boast of what misery he had been able to inflict gave me a keener sense of my sister's sufferings and solely for that reason, I would have rejected his offer. I could not however be insensible to the compliment of such a man's affection but that gave me little comfort. My mind was whirling around his pride, his abominable pride and his shameless avowal of what he had done with respect to Jane and Wickham, and even during the proposal, my anger was hard to conceal. I promptly refused his offer for I am not willing to compromise my principles and self belief and I am reluctant to place marriage at the centre of my ambitions without any regard for feelings and circumstances although Darcy's income of ten thousand pounds a year would provide a comfortable living. ...read more.


The wrongdoing of Mr Darcy to be desirous of believing her indifferent and more so, act accordingly without understanding her true sentiments is certain. Was it not clear to him that a certain desirable event would take place as a result of the ardent love that Jane and Bingley bestowed upon each other? The happiness of both my sister and I has been eclipsed and destroyed by his insensitivity and impertinence. I do not believe he would do such deeds if he truly loved me. Is it so difficult for him to learn that while status is important, breeding is not dependent on rank? This letter only serves to further provoke my anger against Mr Darcy's attitude and my animosity towards him is at its most intense. I find his behaviour towards Jane and Wickham offensive and proud and I cannot find any excuse in his letter to do him justice. ( Three hours later...) Dear Diary, In my perturbed state of mind, with thoughts that could rest on nothing, I unfolded the letter soon again and collecting myself as well as I could, I began the mortifying perusal of all that related to Jane and Wickham. With a somewhat clearer attention, I commanded myself so far as to examine the meaning of every sentence. But when I read, and re-read with the closest of attention, the particulars immediately following Wickham's resigning all pretensions to the living, of his receiving in lieu, so considerable a sum of three thousand pounds, I was forced to hesitate. ...read more.


In this state of depression, I could no longer think of anything else apart from my letter. It was thoroughly wrong of me to proceed to accuse Darcy of his selfish disdain of the feelings of others when I was the one who sought to maintain preconceived opinions and ignorance, the one who had driven reason away, where either were concerned. How could I have been so easily blinded by Wickham to be unaware of my own faults, pride and vanity towards Darcy? I have not only been unjust to Mr Darcy who has been innocent in the whole affair, but I have most certainly driven away his ardent love for me. If only I had understood everything as I do now, perhaps I would have been engaged to this perfectly polite and well bred gentleman! I would not blame him for losing interest in me, but oh! if only he would propose to me again and give me a chance to apologise. I have treated Darcy with such cold civility and inflicted so much misery on him whilst giving Wickham all the pleasure of my company. When I remember the style of his address, I am full of indignation but when I consider how unjustly I have condemned and upbraided Darcy, my anger is turned against myself. Darcy's conduct is now cleared of all blame and I can only learn from my mistake that I should not think ill of anyone without honest reasons for my judgment. Love Lizzy ...read more.

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