Daniela Sforza, 10P
The Regret
Going back I remember my childhood being filled with happiness and joy, mainly because of the good atmoshere my household held. I was raised in a well- noff, loving family. I can not imagine what I would have done without this kind of support in my life.
Now I was a good kid and at the age of only 7, I concentrated on all the good things I wanted to do with my life and the ambitions I had, I was determined to get a job of my dreams. I had a caring family and had a great attitude towards life, nothing was going to get in the way of anything I wanted out of life and I thought nothing would ever change that attitude I had. I promised myself to never smoke, do drugs, drink, or harm myself or other people. I was very confident that I would live the life that my friends and family demanded of me.
Well, going into my teenage years, that all changed. Before I knew it I was doing everything I said I would never do. Sure I still went to church often, and I still considered myself a good person. During this time I got into listening to immoral music, hanging out with immoral people, and basically living the life you would expect from a lost person. No one but my family and church could have known I was saved. Of course, my grades dropped, my standards as well, and finally I didn't even realize what my purpose for life ...
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Well, going into my teenage years, that all changed. Before I knew it I was doing everything I said I would never do. Sure I still went to church often, and I still considered myself a good person. During this time I got into listening to immoral music, hanging out with immoral people, and basically living the life you would expect from a lost person. No one but my family and church could have known I was saved. Of course, my grades dropped, my standards as well, and finally I didn't even realize what my purpose for life was. I contemplated suicide, I filled my mind with hate and sorrow, never taking a look at what I had become. I had traveled on a path so far away from everyone who cared for me and loved me, that it would take a miracle to ever expect to live the way my friends and family wanted me to and that is exactly what happened.
All of this went on to about my senior year in high school, I was considered what you call a trouble maker in my school always getting into all kinds of situations. I took pride in being in a group considered the most rebelious in the school. My only idle had shot himself in the head, so you can see how big my self esteem was.
Well, during my senior year I started to feel a little bit different than before. Slowly I started to dress nicer, I stopped causing trouble, and my grades began to improve. I consider this my first change into the direction of God, yet I still was holding on to my worldly ways.
Then it happened, during the summer following my senior year, my school was sending the young children to a summer camp called Disney. Donna Young, one of my school teacher's who i got on really well with, called me up and asked if I would go as a sponsor, because of they were short of people going and needed one more person to go for this camp to go ahead. I took a day to think about it, my mind said no, but I felt somthing in my heart telling me to go. So I went.
During the week we participated in lots of activities and through this one day everything changed my heart through the kids that were there. Seeing those kids joining in all the activities and being so friendly towards one another touched my heart in a way I had not felt before.
I suddenly went back to my childhood, pondering about my care free days, when all I cared about was everyone living a happy life. The week down at Disney filled my heart with laughter and joy, and suddenly I realized the importance of my journey. All the children spoke to me with love and mercy even though I was known to cause trouble, changing me in only a week. My family was stunned at the shimmer in my eye, and the caring in my voice. I was now as closed to my friends and family as I had ever been!
Only about 2 months later, my school teacher asked me to teach Sunday school for the 6th through 8th graders. Looking back I cant believe how off track I went. I regret my state of mind being so low and I cant believe I actually survived my teenage years.
The point is that my family kept me in reach, never letting me get to far away from thier side. True, I have regrets of my past but I have to look past that and look to the future. No one is ever too far away, taking chances can change things for the best, I am living proof. Every night I thank them for saving my soul and delivering me from evil even when I did not even realize it. I will never underestimate the power of living in such a great society for I am determined to get what I want out of life.
