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Tommorrow When The War Began

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English Huh (Sigh)... I'm so tired, frustrated and just annoyed. I'm sick of this stupid senseless war, I wish it never began. If only I could go back to the ways things were before. No longer would I have to sleep in this daggy, old sleeping bag. No longer would I have to live in such poor and devastating conditions. Instead, I would be tucked inside my warm, clean queen size bed, surrounded by four walls and I would feel an indescribable feeling: one of safety and love; one that you would only find at a place called 'home'. I'd never thought I'd be in such a challenging and perplexing situation in all my life. I'd always seen pictures of the devastating results of war on the news and in the local paper, but I never knew that one day that would be me; struggling to survive in such unfamiliar conditions, dodging bullets 24 - 7 and living life as a guerrilla, conscious of every little movement. ...read more.


I don't even know if they even made it to the hospital, let alone if they're still alive. Once again I'm just left with millions of questions; millions of questions and not a single answer. Our group of eight has now turned into six; Ellie. Lee, Homer, Chris, Robyn and me. Not only has this tragic event brought down ours numbers but also our spirit, hope and determination. I wonder if it's possible for the group to just continue deteriorating until it's so small that there's nobody left. I don't think I could cope with another loss. I mean the thought has crossed my mind so many times, but now it seems much more probable. It's a horrid and unpleasant thought I know, one that I wouldn't dare to discuss or even mention near the others, but one that will always be in the back of my head, as a possibility. ...read more.


Sometimes I wonder how I possibly survived without Homer. Since the war began, I have become such a different person. It has pushed me to my limits physically and emotionally and shown others what I am really capable of. I definitely shocked everyone, including myself, when my rougher side began to show. Know I am no longer seen as the rich girl who would have nightmares about breaking a nail, but instead I am accepted as a rural. You don't understand how hard it was being so different to the others, how left out I felt. Well I guess I proved them all wrong, and I hope they learnt not to judge a book by its cover, just like they judged me. I can't believe that this is really my life. I'm still finding it hard for it to sink in. The past seems like it has no meaning anymore and the only thing that seems to matter, is the unpredictable future and what may lie ahead. It worries me to death. ...read more.

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