In relation to that, what is it with chavs and their hoodies? It’s like they know they’re ugly and are trying to compensate for it. They would lose in a fashion contest against Mr Bean! I suppose it adds to their gangster factor though, and also assists in making them look hard. I mean, come on, if we saw their adolescence face walking down an alley, we wouldn’t exactly be scared would we?
Thirdly, they’re always playing really loud, really rubbish music either on their phones or in their pimpmobiles. On buses, in the street, in shops, wherever you see them, they always do it. Friends’, seeing a chav in a car without any music on probably means you’re looking at a police car. But music would have to be a very vague term to include the kind of trash they listen to; a bunch of guys in their underwear trying to sing about how they ‘shanked’ someone, about how they ‘shot’ someone – that’s not music – that’s balderdash adding to the noise pollution.
What do chavs say at the apex of their career? “Do you want fries with that?” The joke tells a true story – chavs often work in fast food restaurants. Go to McDonalds and expect to be served by a chav. Even worse, you’ll find a big plague of townies outside swarming the place leaving it near impossible to enter by any other person. They drool over the fact that they could also, one day, be serving burgers and chips for £3.85 an hour. Their wish for these jobs leads me to name them: “The Wannabe Maccy D Ratboys.”
With all this in mind, it seems to me the real reason we should lock up chavs and chavettes is because they are a waste of space, underwear and good oxygen. They’re a public nuisance and find hype in creating new words which spread amongst the youth. So please, friends, join with me in the rebellion against chavs, and get … them … banned!