I mentioned the point that the river Aire-Leeds used to be a mess and dirty (simply because people stereotype major Cities as dirty and spoilt areas) but is now a much cleaner place,. After describing a little about the old dirty place I then go on to back up the point that it is now cleaner by using the phrase, “Thanks to many schemes aimed to clean up the river it is now a much rosier scene with blooming flower beds flat and student accommodation hugging the river banks.” Here I use the word “rosier” this is done to give the reader the impression that the water is almost pure. “Rosier” works brilliant with the fact that after this I use “blooming flowerbeds” these 2 words make the reader think that the river has luscious flower growth, Here I use a metaphor e.g “Rosier” sounding like rose which is a beautiful summer flower, Again very persuasive.
I try to promote river fishing in the second paragraph as I go on to say that many people now feel that in order to catch good sized fish it is necessary to travel to a commercial fishery and “pay £10 for a day ticket.” This then brings money into the equation and starts to make people think more seriously about how £10 could be spent. I then almost criticise readers by writing “These people must be mad” but the criticism is avoided as it is though I am speaking to some one else. I then tell the reader that the fishing on the river Aire is free and this works well to encourage the reader to try river fishing as it gives a good comparison of “£10 and FREE.”
Referring back to the target audience, I say that the target audience is an experienced angler, This is because some of the words I use in the article are technical fishing terms. For example I use words like “pegs” and “swim”, these words to any person have a totally different meaning to what they do with an angler. Another sentence where technical fishing words are used is “The in-line groundbait feeder is the most regular method” This means very little to people who have no knowledge of fishing and therefore shows the article is for people who have experience with fishing.
When I go on to talk about the tackle, which should be used, it is a really technical sentence e.g. “My ideal set up would be a 3lb mainline attached to a 2.1lb hook length using a size 18 hook.” This has a massive amount of meaning and detail to an experienced angler, but to some one who has no idea about fishing it is like a foreign language.
In paragraphs three and six I go on to give details and describe how many fish can be caught from this river. In paragraph three I tell the reader that hauls of “60lb” of fish have been taken from the river, and in paragraph six explain that even in winter when the rate is slow “40lb” bags can be caught. I decided to use these two paragraphs to give details of the fishing because paragraph three isn’t too far in for the reader to be informed, paragraph six is a good point to remind the reader again on how well the river fishes again to persuade the readers.
In the fourth paragraph I use the phrase “to tease determined anglers.” The word “tease” is put in there as though it is a set challenge for an angler to catch one of these fish. Making the reader feel like he has had a challenge laid before him and again drawing the river to try river fishing as commercial anglers are always mocking river fishing as an easy sport.
I use the word “Spook” and this could be considered as colloquial and stop the speech being formal, but to an angler it makes perfect sense. This is another term for the fish being scared and again is a technical word used in fishing.
In paragraph nine I use a bid in order to save myself in-case of a lapse in the fishing. I write, “if the river isn’t showing any signs of action there is a safety net just 5 minutes walk away.” I do this simply because I can’t carry on ranting and raving about how well the river fishes if the people I am telling it to go and fail to catch. I use the word “safety
net” as this just reassures the reader that if all else fails then help is at hand.
In the last paragraph I use a rhetorical question “Why not try the river Aire one week?” This arouses curiosity within the reader, also carries on the fishing idea using a metaphor and makes the reader want to find out more about the river or maybe even try the river.
Word count 1022
