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Peer Reviews
Here's what a star student thought of this essay
Quality of writing
For the most part, this essay is written very well in terms of spelling and grammar. There is one slight error in terminology, when he/she says that the 'death rate is lower' because this is not quite relevant or true, but it is the life expectancy that should be mentioned instead. Figures and statistics would upgrade this answer as well, particularly as it is discussing costs, a couple of figures on prices to the economy or dependence ratios would be valued highly by the examiner to show they have learnt the information and understand how to apply it. The mentions of countries, such as Kenya and the UK are good, but should be developed more to truly gain the top marks.
Level of analysis
Mostly, the candidate has answered the question in a detailed and comprehensive manner. All aspects of the question are covered, and the student clearly links the outlined consequences to how the economy and society would be affected, for example 'can't have jobs and contribute to the country and its economy'. This point was then further developed and carried on well. The youthful population and ageing population could also be linked together maybe, by discussing how a youthful population could become ageing as they grow older if a country develops at the same speed. To some extent, the relevance of including the benefits of each is limited, considering the question only asks the student to look at 'costs' although one sentence on each may be a benefit, depending on the examiner or particular mark scheme. A summary conclusion may also help to show the examiner that the student can sum up key points and basic ideas.
Response to question
It is clear throughout that the candidate has understood the question and covers the topics queried; they cover both ageing and youthful populations in both MEDCs and LEDCs, which of course have different effects, showing that they have a basis of geographical understanding. The question would be improved with the addition of an introduction as well. This shows the examiner that the student does understand what is being asked, provides a starting point to plan and structure ideas from, but also gives a good first impression. Definitions of what ageing and youthful populations are, as well as perhaps MEDC and LEDC would improve the answer, and elevate the introduction to a higher level.