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Oh, What a Lovely Pair!

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Another drop of sweat dropped down my forehead and off the end of my nose as my eyes moved vigorously behind my dark shades. "Oh what a lovely pair!" I thought to myself, however I seemed to have thought out loud rather than to myself. My curious wife, who was lying on her sun bed next to me queried: "A lovely pair of what?" "A lovely pair of sunglasses, they are great at keeping out the glare." I was getting rather bored on his sunbathing outing to the beach, so I decided to take some money out of the wife's purse and head up towards the main town, where I could have a beverage and possibly a bite to eat. To get up towards the bars and restaurants I had to cross over a main and very busy road, there were always mopeds rushing by, not even giving you the slightest of chances to cross over. Even though there are plenty of zebra crossings throughout the resort's roads, I think that the locals just assume that the black and white stripes across the street are a nice decoration. Finally I managed to get to the other side of the mad obstacle. It would have been a good twenty-minute stroll up past some tacky old souvenir shops until I reached the exciting part of the holiday resort. ...read more.


I decided to buy the book I paid in cash. I exited the posh shopping mall and headed up towards the small, tacky old souvenir shops. I took the same route as earlier on. I came across a young man, who looked well educated; he was in a business suit with a lovely pair of trousers on. I was going to ask him where he bought his trousers, but then noticed what a silly thing that would be. I could have asked him where the nearest charity shop was, but he would have thought that I was a scruff or something, in the end I decided to just ask the man for the time. I was trying to pick someone out of the passing crowd who was normal looking, and not an over-paid businessman. After a good five minutes of searching I decided to approach an old lady, she was wearing some old and tatty clothes, to be honest, they looked as though they were bought from some kind of charity shop or car boot sale. So I caught eye contact with the lady and asked, "Hay una tienda caridad por aqui?" Which in English means, "is there a charity shop around here?" The lady replied, "Si, esta a la derecha" which means, "Yes, it's on the right." ...read more.


"Where have you been? I've been worried out of my mind." My curious, hag of a wife asked. So I looked at her with a frustrated expression on my face. I produced the dodgy pair of shorts from the used plastic bag that the lady in the shop had given to me. My wife asked, "What is wrong with those? They look fine to me." "What? I asked furiously. "These shorts have me more bother in the last couple of hours than you have since our marriage, it is unbelievable." My wife still couldn't see the 'slight' imperfection in the garment, so I decided to point it out to her. "Now do you see what is wrong with them?" The look on her face was outstanding, I wish I had my two for the price of one disposable camera with me; it would have made a great picture for her fiftieth birthday in the local newspaper. We both laughed together, she still brings that point up now, twenty years on. I should never have stayed with this woman; I should have approached the babe on the beach earlier on, or even the stunner in the shoe shop for that matter! Another drop of sweat dripped down my forehead and off the end of my nose as my eyes moved vigorously behind my dark shades... ?? ?? ?? ?? Matthew Fairhurst 10L English Original Writing ...read more.

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