Christian German 8A
Why does Green Peace want Antarctica as a World Park?
Antarctica has become a unique place in the modern world, the only continent that remains relatively untouched by human interference and therefore arguably the only pristine wilderness left on Earth. For Greenpeace it seemed imperative to keep it that way. Some ecologists have even argued that Antarctica could provide important information for future generations seeking to reverse the environmental degradation wrought by humanity in the Twentieth Century.
Paradoxically, despite winds of up to 450 kilometres per hour and temperatures reaching -50C Antarctica has the most delicate ecosystem of any place on earth. Ever since humankind began to explore the continent, from Amundsen and Scott's famous battle to the South Pole onwards, it had been noted that Antarctic ecosystems take years to recover from damage if they recover at all: a footprint in the moss can linger for decades before it disappears. This proposed World Park can also protect the delicate ecosystem like the Antarctic Treaty but even better let scientists make experiments while not harming the environment to see ways on how to deal with climate change. This shows it would be better for Antarctica to become a World Park because the animals will get a better protection from all those people in there while without it will just encourage poachers because there will be less security and political interference.
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Peer Reviews
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Quality of writing
Punctuation, grammar and spelling all done to a very good standard. The essay flows well and the tone of the essay is spot on
Level of analysis
The introduction is done very well. It sets out some of the arguments they are set to cover throughout the rest of the essay. They set out a range of different factors as to why the Antarctic is considered a world park. The candidate lacks a conclusion which should have been used to tie up any loose ends and generally bring together their opinion on why green peace wants to use Antarctica as a world park. The candidate does not mention any other possible things that the Antarctic may be good for which would put another depth to the essay.
Response to question
The candidate addresses the question well. Their focus is displayed well throughout the essay from the various topics they have chosen, and they go into good depth about each point analysing the concept of the question well.
