Another point which could be made from the line “I was aware that blood was running down through the delta of my wrist and under arches of bright bone” is that he is sensing his own living being. It reflects the fact that he is a living being filled with excitement.
The poet goes on to describe his journey to the hospital in the third stanza. It is apparent that he cannot wait to arrive at the hospital. He claims that he is “crossing (at sixty) Magdalen Bridge”, which means that he is travelling at a speed that exceeds the recommended limit on an ancient bridge. This is a clear measure of his desperation.
His emotion changes slightly here where he starts to plead to God in an urgent prayer “Let it be son, a son” which is emphasised again later in this stanza. It is possible that he would prefer a son because he wants the family name to continue. In comparison to a lucky prince in the first stanza, he refers to himself now as a “man in the driving mirror”, as he is uncertain of his new role as a father. He has been transformed – he can’t recognise himself because of his high emotional state.
He is exceptionally euphoric, and the poet conveys this prospect by giving life to objects, which would normally go unnoticed. “The tower held up its hand: the college bells shook their blessing on his head”. The pathetic fallacy used here on both of these inanimate objects serves to project his mood on these objects.
However in the fourth stanza, the “almond’s shadow blossom” suggests that there might be sorrow to come. Nevertheless, Jon Stallworthy chooses to use another pathetic fallacy where “the tree was waving, waving me upstairs…”, which is a welcoming image to the hospital nearby. Another child’s image is conveyed here when he implies, “… upstairs with a child’s hands”. This further confirms that he is overwhelmed with excitement.
In the fifth stanza, the pace is considerably quickened with the use of enjambment on the prepositions “up” and “along”, which could intimate tension. The imagery used here is very descriptive: for example, “bone-white”, which reflects the hygiene in the hospital. Stallworthy also uses repetition here: “shuddered with the shuddering womb” and “wave after wave, wave after wave”. This repetition reflects the contractions of his wife in labour. The poet ends this stanza with an abrupt “whom?”, which could mean that he is unsure who this new arrival is; will it be a boy, like he hoped, or a girl?
The sixth stanza uses money image, where he compares his infant to a “bright farthing”. He conveys the value of this coin to this new arrival; even though it is small, it “enriches” him. He appreciates that with this coin, there is an everlasting link between its two parents. The emotion that he feels up to this point is still excitement and joy.
It is in the seventh stanza however when this ecstasy twists takes a sharp turn with the words “scissored” and “slicing” which are both very harsh, piercing images, giving a sense of foreboding. This emotion is now turned to forlornness when the doctor tells him the heartbreaking truth about his child. Both of these words also indicate that his primary bonding with his son has been cut.
In the next stanza, Stallworthy employs the word “bullet” to portray the pain and physical agony of learning about his child’s disabilities. “This was my first death” tells the reader that this is his first experience of anguish, and again later in the next stanza, he labels himself “late”, as if he is inwardly dead. The pace in this stanza is very slow – in fact, it gives the impression that everything is moving in slow motion. The poet’s emotion is now pain and shock. He feels detached by this traumatic experience; he undergoes an out-of-body experience, which can be nature’s way of dealing with shock. The use of simile is appropriate here when he draws a comparison between himself and a pilot who has just been ejected from a wrecked aircraft, as they both feel no pain up in the air. This is further emphasised when he describes himself as looking at “four walls in the lens of an eye; wall, window, the street” – as if he is looking through the wrong end of a telescope.
The poet’s emotion is now changed to grief: “a torrent”, which could be related to tears. As he feels he is still up in the air looking down at his body and the surroundings, he experiences no pain and so he “wrestles against gravity”: he doesn’t want to go back into his body. However he realises that “light was melting”, which illustrates that he feels he has to go back into darkness, back into reality, and back into his “unfamiliar” self. He identifies himself as unfamiliar because he seems different – not in total control of himself. His body feels awkward as it is still in such a state of shock.
Another simile is used in the thirteenth stanza where he compares the hospital to a freight ship. He knows that in a hospital, some people are bound to come back; some won’t: “…with some on board soon to be lost if the desperate charts were known.” He also knows that spending time at a hospital can be a life changing experience: “Others would come altered to land or find the land altered.” He is in a pensive mood now.
“At their voyage’s end some would be added to, some diminished” – this means that there will be some births and some deaths. The word “diminished” starts on a new stanza, giving it a more accented emphasis. This is appropriate because all the expectations of his baby that he anticipated have all been dashed. He feels that he will never be able to communicate with his child as he expresses, “never to come ashore into my kingdom speaking my language.” Hence, he is convinced that he will never be able to relate to his own child. The word “kingdom” also creates an important contrast to the fairytale image at the beginning of the poem. This technique of using fairytale imagery here successfully conveys his devastation when he realises that he will not be able to communicate with his son because of his disability.
In the sixteenth stanza, the poet draws strength from the almond tree. This marks the beginning of his epiphany. “The almond tree was beautiful in labour”, from winter, when the tree is just a mere skeleton to spring when the tree is in full blossom. He feels that there is a gulf between and his son: “Out of reach”, and “only when the buds, all the buds, were broken would the tree be in full sail” – through suffering of a broken man comes new acceptance. The tree is only beautiful and meaningful when the tree is in full blossom, just like life is when you accept new ideas, when you live a fuller life without a narrow prejudiced vision.
He is hit with the realisation that all his life he has been wrapped and enclosed in his own views: “wrenched from the caul of my thirty years’ growing”. It is as if he has been “set free” from this restricted vision that he has been entrapped in his whole life and turned into a new, more accepting, human being. No matter how hard or how long it will take, he realises that he and his son would have to reach out to each other, they will “tunnel each other out”. Between themselves, this is an unspoken “covenant”.
Through the birth of this baby, he has a new affirmation of life. He knows he has to face up to reality regardless of how painful it might be. And for the first time since he learned the distressing news about his baby, the poet refers to him as his “little mongol love”, which shows that he is now affectionate towards his child. He realises that the baby might not learn as much as other children learn from their parents, but he knows that he already “learnt more from the baby’s lips”. He appreciates the fact that only through suffering, can happiness truly be appreciated.