When I heard Biff asking his dad to convince his teacher to give him more points I absolutely melted. He really admired his dad and he believed that he could persuade the teacher! He swore all Willy had to do was talk to him and he’d change his mind.
But Willy was just so delicate…when I first saw him he looked so downtrodden, like the weight of the world was just resting on his poor hunched shoulders. But when we began to talk I just couldn’t resist him. He had such a great sense of humor you know. I was just trying to give him a companion. He was always babbling about how lonely he was, how there was nobody to talk to on the road.
When I came out of the bathroom the whole scene changed. I got so mad when he tried to shove me out of the door in my slip! He made up that story about the bath and them painting my room so fast; I was so confused and didn’t realize what he was trying to do. I could have played along, if only I knew…By that point all I could think about was my stockings, I didn’t know what was happening, honest, or I wouldn’t have made such a scene.
When I last talked to Willy he told me that his son had not only flunked math, but couldn’t graduate. And he wouldn’t admit it, but I heard from someone that his son had just given up after that night in Boston. He didn’t go to summer school and he didn’t go to the University of Virginia. But Willy still believed in that boy. No matter what he was constantly trying to gain back his approval and his faith. He obsessed over it. He really loved that kid. The saddest thing was, I don’t think he ever succeeded.
His last attempt to win him over seemed, strangely enough, to be his death. Why would Willy do that? I still don’t understand him. He used to be such a funny little man. I can’t believe he did it on purpose…. rumors are he did it all for the insurance money because he and his family were broke. To save face he had been borrowing money from a neighbor for quite a while. He used to be such a good salesman. I would let him right in to the buyers, I wouldn’t let him wait. He should have been a partner in his firm. He gave the majority of his life to that company and by the end, he had nothing to show for it, not even a salary. Poor, poor Willy…
I don’t think I’ll ever know all the details of what happened after I left, but by the look on the boy’s face he was shocked. He couldn’t have understood how lonesome and sad poor Willy was. A man on the road needs someone, he needs some support and …. He worked so hard to get where he was. He was so devoted to making a living for his boys; he was always talking and bragging about those boys. “Biff is going to be a great success” he’d say “he’s really well-liked.” And then some times he was so gloomy. He became desperate to make the next sale, to make money to pay off this bill or that bill. But when he was with me he seemed to cheer up for just a few hours. I know overall I probably did more harm than good, but how was I to know…. that boy just came knocking at the door…. it was the middle of the night…how was I to know?
