• Join over 1.2 million students every month
  • Accelerate your learning by 29%
  • Unlimited access from just £6.99 per month

Small rodents make wonderful pets.

Extracts from this document...

Introduction

Small rodents make wonderful pets. Anyone who has owned one would readily aggree that hamsters, girlbils, and mice provide an owner with hours of amusement and years of companionship. Rabbits are fabulous for those who are looking for a quiet playmate, while rats and ferrets are hyperactive and surprisingly intelligent. Guinea pigs are another very popular choice for a small pet. A website dedicated to guinea pigs boasts on their front page that there is no question that "guinea pigs make excellent pets [and are] docile, low maintenance, and unbelievably cute."

I strongly beg to differ, unless "docile" means "boring" and "low maintenance" means that you only need to scoop up piggy pellet poop every few minutes. Calling a guinea pig "unbelievably cute" is at, very best, a far stretch. Their bodies are shaped like a packing tube, fat through the middle and flat at both ends.

To anyone who is considering purchasing a guinea pig and is convinced that no other rodent will do, I would urge them to go to a local lumber yard and get themselves a lovely block of wood instead. I am convinced that after weighing the positives and negatives, an ordinary log would prove to be a far better pet than a guinea pig.

...read more.

Middle

A block of wood, however, can be an indoor or outdoor pet regardless of the weather, and requires no housing other than the surface you choose to put him on. Just think of the floor space saved! He will just as happily "sit and stay" under your bed as perched on your mantle. No messy, smelly bedding or chewed-up accessories are required to keep a pet wooden block happy and healthy. When they are deserving of a treat, no foodstuffs or toys are needed; a hug and some verbal praise are all it takes to tell him that he has been a good boy. Score two for the block of wood.

It is not enough to merely house the guinea pig. No, guinea pigs require a great deal of time-consuming care to keep them healthy. Nail trimming is a must to avoid nasty scratches inflicted on both human and pig, and the manicure process can take on the feeling of a Three Stooges episode with a seemingly-lazy animal suddenly springing to life in a squealing attempt to escape your well-meaning efforts. Teeth must be checked for overgrowth and decay, often caused by a poor diet. Their bedding must be completely changed at least once a week, both for sanitary reasons as well as the unpleasant odors that radiate from an unattended cage.

...read more.

Conclusion

Although a pet wooden block has some similarity to the guinea pig in that it naturally is very still, he makes no nerve-grinding cries for attention and produces no waste product what-so-ever. This last fact alone sends a wooden block soaring above a guinea pig in the contest of who would make a better pet.

Compound all these painful piggy truths with the undeniable fact that, even in apperance, a guinea pig is nothing more than a fur-covered log with eyeballs, it leads to the question, "Well, what does the guinea pig do that the block of wood doesn't do better?"

The answer, quite simply, is nothing.

...read more.

This student written piece of work is one of many that can be found in our GCSE Pay Phone Problem section.

Found what you're looking for?

  • Start learning 29% faster today
  • 150,000+ documents available
  • Just £6.99 a month

Not the one? Search for your essay title...
  • Join over 1.2 million students every month
  • Accelerate your learning by 29%
  • Unlimited access from just £6.99 per month

See related essaysSee related essays

Related GCSE Pay Phone Problem essays

  1. Were coins used in the Roman Empire more for propaganda purposes or as a ...

    So we stamp a value on the coin. One coin that changed was the Antoninianus15. This coin was once a silver coin but, then became a copper coin that that had a silver outer coating. This coin is like the modern day coin, where coins are made of cheap base metals.

  2. The Framework Knitting Museum: An Accurate Reflection of History or Not?

    Framework Knitters received very little pay whilst the Bag Hosiers retailed the Framework Knitter's work and received much more. Framework Knitters were paid in piecework, which meant they were paid for how much work they did not how long. This had both good points and bad to it; the good

  1. Most Wanted Hi, it's me! What, you don't know who I am? That's impossible

    Mozart was one of them, this little brat. Talented he was, oh yeah, I don't deny it. But his early fame didn't do him any good. He was so arrogant, and he actually thought that I should feel grateful to serve him. That I should feel honored to work for a "man" with his reputation.

  2. Duke of Edinburugh's Silver award - Expedition Log Book.

    was always the one trying to sort it out and comfort people, as she is a great listener. She is very calm and relaxed and cheerful so she kept our spirits up when things got tough! She also helped do a lot of map work.

  1. Perception - the interpretation of information.

    This shows that you can adapt to a different way of living by getting to know what is around you, so it shows that he was able to learn how to cope with this situation and it didn't come to him straight away. In 1966 Bower set up an investigation.

  2. The woman is going to make a phone call costing any multiple of 10p. ...

    Having done and tested the formulae for: 10p, 20p Tx = T(x-1)+T(x-2) 10p, 30p Tx = T(x-1)+T(x-3) 10p, 40p Tx = T(x-1)+T(x-4) I will now start predicting the formula for 10p, 50p. Prediction When comparing the three formulae, it is noticeable that the second part of the equation on the right-hand side is decreasing with one number each time.

  1. Algebra Coursework (payphone problem).

    = T5 = T4+T1 60p = T6 = T5+T2 70p = T7 = T6+T3 80p = T8 = T7+T4 90p = T9 = T8+T5 So, �1�s prediction will be �1 = T10 = T9+T6 Explanation As every "total no of combinations" of putting the coins into the pay phone are

  2. The Mysterious Train.

    I must have been reading for roughly ten minutes so I looked down at my watch noticing it was twenty two past three and still there was no sign of the train, but I thought nothing of it, for all I knew my watch may have been ticking too fast!

  • Over 160,000 pieces
    of student written work
  • Annotated by
    experienced teachers
  • Ideas and feedback to
    improve your own work