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Who is the more dangerous of the species!

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Introduction

Who is the more dangerous of the species!

Deep in the deserts of Nevada, on the outskirts of (Las Vegas), there lives a species of arachnid…poisonous, deadly, and feared by many…the black widow spider. So called because the female eats the male after the mating ritual, hence becoming a ‘widow’. No prizes for guessing who wears the trousers in this couple, but what about man----sorry, I mean HUMANkind?!

Who is the more dangerous of the species?   I am sure you are all wondering what the answer to this is; indeed, you wouldn’t be the first! People have been deliberating, cogitating and trying to digest the solution to this highly controversial issue for centuries. I would like to begin by mentioning some fascinating statistics. There are more females to males in the world with 51.3% of the world’s population being female. The % of males is rapidly (and when I say, rapidly, I mean in evolutionary terms) declining. Worried, well we should be!

It has been said that the Y-chromosome is deteriorating slowly but, unfortunately, steadily. The way things are going, we may be faced with a situation where men will become extinct.

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Middle

cringe!!! Proof of men’s (shall we say) non-existent pain threshold occurs in a ‘Friends’ episode, when Joey has his eyebrows plucked. As a result he only gets one eyebrow done, whereas we women have to go through this every day. The word that comes to mind is “CHICKEN!”

Let’s discuss the differences between men’s and women’s brains. It is said that women are more creative and art-orientated, whereas only men have the cranial capacity to contemplate mathematics and science. After all, how many female car mechanics have you ever seen?!  These ideas are very restricting, especially considering the scientific genius people like Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin and, more recently, Susan Greenwood.

In history many famous doctors, scientists and revolutionary thinkers have been men.

While I realise that some of these people have been women the actual number is pathetically tiny in comparison. The reason being, that women have been downtrodden and dismissed for centuries. In all cultures around the world women have been treated as second- class citizens, with no rights, no opportunities and most importantly no freedom. Old fashioned ideas such as dowry are loosing popularity, but why do they still exist.

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Conclusion

 Women have notoriously been branded as ‘nags’…who knows, maybe this makes them even more dangerous, many men have been driven to new heights of insanity by their over-bearing wives. I’m sure the double X chromosomers out there know: nagging is a powerful weapon which we sometimes wield unmercifully: my apologies to the XY’s!!!

And of course there are the classics about the male’s absolute inability to grow up. ‘What is the difference betweens men and government bonds? The bonds mature’. While differences between the sexes invariably exist, it is true to say that we all constitute the same species: that of humankind. Life without one or the other would be, quite frankly, boring. Let’s face it: soap opera’s wouldn’t exist, Cilla Black would be out of a job (or wouldn’t have even had one in the first place) and Bill Clinton wouldn’t have uttered the biggest lie on the planet!

So, to conclude, I would like to quote a famous poet, who once said: ‘the female of the species is more deadly than the male’. Shock shock. Horror horror. Like we didn’t know that in the first place! (Thank you ladies and Gentlemen)

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