‘Are you ready to accept children lovingly from God and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?’ this question is one which is stating your willingness to have children. All Christian marriages should be life giving if possible.
After this there is a bit called ‘The Vows’ which is where the Bride and Groom announce their love and faithfulness to their partner. The Vows are important they declare there will be no separation in the marriage, ‘For better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.’ This is just stating the intentions of the marriage.
Then comes the Priests blessing, ‘What God has joined together let no man put asunder’. This is saying God has now joined you together in matrimony, so no mortal man can ever separate you. This is emphasising that you have made your vows to stay together for the rest of your lives and God has accepted them and taken you both in as husband and wife. God has now united you in marriage, humans must not divide the relationship by divorce etc.
The Priest then blesses the rings, saying the words, ‘Take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity’. This is a sign of your relationship and of the other person’s love for you. The ring is chosen because it is round and symbolises unending love and faithfulness.
There are differences in the Christian wedding and Orthodox weddings, as I will point out now. In an Orthodox wedding the ceremony begins when the rings are blessed at the rear of the church, then the couple move into the church where the marriage takes place in the centre of the church on a table. There are then readings from the bible explaining the meaning of marriage. As these are read the couple hold candles as a symbol of the ‘light’ or guidance that Christians receive from Gods word.
The priest then places crowns or circlets of flowers on the couples’ heads. This symbolises the man and woman being the King and Queen of a new family. In the Russian Orthodox Church this has a special name, ‘Crowning’. The Groom’s crown displays an image of Jesus and the Brides crown has the Virgin Mary upon it. The couple then drink from a shared chalice of wine; this symbolises the shared life they will have together. Finally, holding hands, the couple, led by the priest, circle around the table three times. A circle is a symbol of the eternal love of God and also a symbol of the couple’s hope for an unending marriage.
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The Roman Catholic Church teaches that marriage is permanent and designed to last forever. The Catholic Church doesn’t believe in divorce. Jesus banned divorce, because when you marry you make a covenant with God that cannot be broken by man. The Catholic Church will not allow people to remarry in church.
In contrast, many Protestant Christians believe that divorce can occur, and that divorced people can remarry in church.
All Christian churches view marriage as a serious and life-long commitment. The Catholic Church will only allow divorces or annulments of marriages in exceptional circumstances. It could be argued that the Catholic view is out of date in modern western society where divorces and remarriages are becoming increasingly common. Marriages can brake down for many reasons, such as adultery, violence in the marriage, dis-satisfaction of one partner with the other, or both partners agreeing that they don’t love one another any more.
The traditional Catholic view seems to be unsympathetic towards couples who are experiencing marital difficulties. It could be argued that the Catholic Church encourages people to stay in marriages that are abusive to them. By staying in marriages that are unhappy, people may be ruining their lives. The Catholic Church does not seem to accept that people can make mistakes in choosing their marital partner, or that some marriages can change to become very abusive. Other churches recognise that in reality some marriages are not good for the people involved, and that people should be able to get divorced and may be able to find happiness in a second marriage. After all did God not teach tolerance and forgiveness of sins, should a person be determined to lead a new life.
It could be argued, however, that by taking a traditional view of the life-long commitment that marriage should aspire to, the Catholic Church, is helping people in marriages, as well as society.
By divorces being so acceptable to modern day society, people might feel encouraged to divorce should problems occur within their marriage. By discouraging divorce, the Catholic church encourages people to attempt to work through problems and to develop themselves as people as well as in a couple. It appears that divorces are very painful experiences for not only the individuals involved but also causes problems for families and friends of the couple. Divorces especially can affect children.
My view is that the Catholic Church is right in its stance not to allow divorce apart from exceptional circumstances. It is right not to allow people to remarry in church because it would be hypocritical to view marriage as a life-long commitment and then to allow people to remarry.
I can understand other churches such as Protestant churches allowing divorces and accepting second-marriages, because some marriages cannot be helped and cause great unhappiness to the people involved. When this view is dominant in society and there is an acceptance of divorce and remarriage, it lessons the importance of the commitment to marriage and can inadvertently encourage marital breakdown. The Catholic Church in my view may be seen as unsympathetic to people having marital problems, but is tremendously supportive to the value of marriage in society.