Jesina Elliston
AP Biology Essay 1
Water is a molecule composed of two elements of hydrogen covalently bonded with one element of oxygen. Because of the polarity created from the covalent bond these molecules of water are all connected with a hydrogen bond. A hydrogen bond is formed when two molecules are attracted to oppositely charged components of another molecule. A hydrogen bond has about 5% the strength of a covalent bond and is responsible for some of the unique qualities found in water. It takes a large amount of energy to break down the hydrogen bonds in water allowing it to have a high specific heat, giving water its high boiling point and allowing it to maintain a liquid form over a wide range of temperatures. The hydrogen bonds also allow water to have high surface tension. This happens because, although one hydrogen bond is relatively weak, when many of these bonds are formed between two molecules it causes the bonds to be sufficiently strong and quite stable. Hydrogen bonding also influences cohesion, the clinging of a water molecule to itself or adhesion, the clinging of a molecule to another molecule.
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Peer Reviews
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Quality of writing
This essay is structured particularly well. The introduction is clear, and I like how each paragraph has a clear signpost. From doing English Literature at A-Level, this is a great technique when writing essays, but it seems to be neglected in other subjects! Starting each paragraph with a simple sentence will make it clear where the marks should be allocated, and often helps you keep focussed without repeating yourself or going off on a tangent! Spelling and grammar is faultless. This essay is to be admired!
Level of analysis
The explanation of water as a molecule is thorough. I like how this essay is structured, introducing the molecule's structure and then explaining how this structure contributes to the qualities of water. It was nice to see how this essay addressed how each quality is relevant, rather than just explaining it. I particularly liked how they mentioned cohesion enabled transpiration in plants - being able to link topics together will gain credit in exams or coursework as it shows an understanding of the syllabus. The use of scientific terms is strong throughout. This essay correctly explains polarity of water molecules and refers to it as the universal solvent - using terminology such as this is a sign of a strong essay! Whenever talking about bonds in biology, I always draw a diagram. So, an improvement for this essay would be to include diagram showing two water molecules with a hydrogen bond clearly labeled.
Response to question
The analysis in this piece is particularly strong, and goes beyond GCSE level. Although there isn't an explicit question, I imagine this could be a response to an essay question in an exam. They have covered nearly all the marking points relevant to water molecules, and so this is a great example for revision of this topic!