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The following text is comprised of an article, suitable to appear in many of the common ladies magazines of the late 19th Century ( ie - Harpers Bazar).

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Introduction

The following text is comprised of an article, suitable to appear in many of the common ladies magazines of the late 19th Century ( ie - Harpers Bazar). Most of these magazines had a general readership of middle to upper class young women and served as another guide to the expectations of society. The purpose of this article is clear - to inform young women of this era with practical advice for the time, however ridiculous it may seem in this century. Mourning and Funeral Etiquette The loss of a loved one has significant impact on the lives of those the deceased has left behind. Not only does it signal the end of a dependable life, but also the commencement of a period of mourning for the widow/widower or servant of the household, where isolation from society is extremely important. The most difficult burden of mourning falls, as expected, on the widow. The entering of a widow into mourning is of high importance after the death of a cherished family member. ...read more.

Middle

In any case - a cruel widow who, instead of showing the proper amount of grief goes so far as to rejoice in her husband's demise, should be aware of society's opinion. She will not be held in high esteem unless she pays respect to the memory of the man whose title she bears. Generally a widow's mourning should last from twelve to eighteen months, depending upon the length of marriage and number of children. The duration of grieving for an uncle, aunt or cousin should be comprised of at least three months in length, and this time must be spent in as close to quiet solitude as possible. If absolutely necessary, friends may visit but only for a short while and they may not introduce jovial or lighthearted games or outings in your time of sorrow. Friends and relatives of those in mourning are advised that the telegraph as a means of communication is excellent and that in many cases arduous face to face communication may not be essential. ...read more.

Conclusion

The consideration of the dead body While a slightly sordid topic, it is less offensive to follow the proper practices and keep it out in the open than to desecrate the memory of the deceased. In terms of the coffin, simplicity is the guide, being much more elegant than the overstated. In dressing the remains for the grave, men should be "clad in his habit as he lived."2 For a woman, a white robe and cap is most appropriate, as are white cashmere robes and flowers for the young. Reintroduction. As a general rule of society, widowers are generally formally allowed to be reintroduced to society at a much earlier date than widows, both in terms of business sensibility and in strength of moral character. Generally, widowers are encouraged to remarry - especially so if the previous marriage had resulted in children. How else are we to care for our kin if not through the replacement of a lady's position? 1 "Mourning and Funeral Usages" Harper's Bazar- April 17, 1886 Quote courtesy - http://www.victoriana.com/library/harpers/funeral.html 2 "Mourning and Funeral Usages" Harper's Bazar- April 17, 1886 Quote courtesy - http://www.victoriana.com/library/harpers/funeral.html ...read more.

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