The advertisement uses strong promotive language designed to get the reader interested in the message and have a positive opinion on the information presented. In attempting to make the tour attractive but also challenging a number of topics are introduced and balanced in the text. The route is historic and beautiful, challenging but manageable, you are in a group but it is an individual experience. Sensory description is used to provide colour and vivid pictures for the reader. It provides the feeling of the sights and sounds of the place it describes. ‘‘The crystal clear water tumbles ‘’, the use of onomatopoeia helps a reader hear the landscape of the Kokoda trail more completely in the imagination. The tumbling of the clear water is a sound that is most known to be relaxing and a key sound of Mother Nature only to be heard in nature. Strong imagery is maintained with dramatic adjectives: “knife edged ridges”, “towering mountains” and “towering trees”. A simplistic picture is drawn with “mountain streams”, and “bridges of vine lashed logs” and welcoming locals in attractive villages with simple food. Active verbs convey the sense of movement and adventure. This is well done at the start of the piece. We don’t cross we “traverse” the streams, water does not fall it ”tumbles”. Hyperbole and superlatives add to the colour and drama of the walk, capturing the reader’s attention. It heightens the attractiveness of the trek to the reader. The trek is “One of the world’s great adventure treks” (line 1), and the place is “One of the most peaceful walks on the face of the earth” (line 17). Additionally we are given the sense of friendly locals in “homely, unspoilt villages”. We are “welcomed with smiles”. (Lines 7 – 8). However, this idyllic picture is disturbed in the next lines with a switch to war references. These same friendly locals become “Fuzzy Wuzzy Angels” in war fighting with the Australians against the Japanese. We are told of a battle, which was “bloody” killed 3,600 people and the remnants and relics are still sometimes found. After this we are then switched back to the locals who “delight” in telling stories of the war (line 18) and again “delight” in showing you the area (23). This narrative switch, although informative, is unsettling for a reader. It disturbs the flow and confuses the message between present peace and landscape beauty with past violence.
The piece uses long sentence structures often with clauses and sub clauses. This is unusual for promotional material, which typically has to grab the reader and transfer information and a simplistic and positive message very quickly. It results in a more informative but reduced dynamic and less direct impact for the reader. The power of the message is also weakened by the constant repetition in the text of “Kokoda Trail”. This is repeated nine times in 29 lines of text with “Trail” used an additional four times. This interferes with the persuasive flow. The message tries to appeal to a wide audience of adventure hikers resulting in some discontinuity in the message. For example, it is stated that 10 days allows “easy days in the middle” (line 21) then 3 lines later (line 24) we are told, “it is not an easy walk”. Only on line 24 are we told if the walk is appropriate for us as the reader should be “experienced at roughing it in the bush”. The text also includes the sentence “Be careful not to rush the walk” (line 20). This could come across to the reader as patronising. Far better to say “Take your time and enjoy the experience”.
In conclusion, the text quickly and concisely presents the basic offering of the trek and does well in painting a general picture of the scenery and experience of the trail. However, it switches quickly between descriptions of nature and history, past and present, physical challenge and helpful locals. The separation of these elements between painting a picture, providing a history lesson and delivering practical information is not always clear which dilutes the persuasive impact and flow of the message. Promotive language and factual information is mixed throughout. The visualisation of the walk experiences is good although the reader is challenged to extract information to make practical decisions on whether the walk is at the right level for them. Overall, the piece is satisfactory as a promotional text with attractive descriptive mood elements. It could be made more effective with separation of topics, simplified and shorter sentence structures and targeting the message to a narrower audience.
by
blackagent7 (student)
