My Practical Theology of the Church

Prologue 

the Gospel and Community: Thoughts from Buechner

†Love God; love others.†

The gospel – the good news – is that human beings are simultaneously dignified and depraved creatures, redeemed by Jesus out of the depths of our depravity and called by him to play out our dignity, both in relationship with Him, our Creator, as well as our fellow creatures. We are called to that relationship by the words of Jesus Christ. He lays out for us what it means to live out our dignity in Matthew 22:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

 

The greatest commandment – love God; love others – sets out for us how to play out the dignity with which we were created and which was redeemed by the death and resurrection of Jesus. And within this commandment lie the implications for what it means to be the Church. The Church’s call is to, most importantly, love God. And the way to do that is to love people.

Now, as members of God’s Church, it seems easy to accept the first part of the commandment: Love the Lord your God. Of course we are supposed to love God. We understand that part. We don’t necessarily do it so well, but we recognize and accept it. As believers, we appreciate that inherent in our faith is loving and being in relationship with the One who created us.

It’s the second part of the commandment we have trouble with. Love your neighbor as yourself. At first glance it makes sense, but we interpret it to mean an insipid sort of, You know, we really should be nice to each other. Or, somehow the notion that sacrificial love means letting other people walk all over you. Many of us equate the adage If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all as obedience to this second half of the commandment. But is this really love? Indulgence and smiley-face bumper stickers that advise don’t worry, be happy? I think not. If great love is described as laying your life down for your friends, I have a hard time equating that with spraypainting “Jesus Saves” on a local mailbox or allowing someone to abuse you.

In his book Telling Secrets, Frederick Buechner offers a powerful perspective on the second half of the great commandment:

 Love your neighbor as yourself is part of the great commandment. The other way to say it is, Love yourself as your neighbor. Love yourself not in some egocentric, self-serving sense but love yourself the way you would love your friend in the sense of taking care of yourself, nourishing yourself, trying to understand, comfort, strengthen yourself.

Buechner flips the commandment around and says that loving your neighbor means loving yourself. Rarely do we hear in our Christian culture a call to love ourselves well; rarely is it explained to us what it means to love ourselves well. Seldom is the connection between loving ourselves and loving others made for us. Not only does Buechner make that connection for us here; he equates loving ourselves with loving our neighbor. But what does it truly mean to love our neighbors? This is not an weak, watered-down version of love. This is not simply shaking hands during greeting time in church on Sunday morning and believing you’ve fulfilled your quota of loving your neighbor this week. Buechner’s words are powerful, connotative ones: taking care, nourishing, understanding, comforting, strengthening. This is not wishy-washy, let-me-bake-you-some-cookies-because-you-have-the-sniffles-today love. These are intense, potent words that imply close, honest relationship. They imply deep intimacy; understanding and nourishing someone means you know him or her really well. You know what he or she really needs to be healthy and whole.

        †telling my story: community†

So what does this look like, this notion of loving myself and loving others well? At least part of the answer to this question lies in the notion of community and, ultimately, the Church and the Kingdom. Because we are creatures created for relationship, I can neither love God, love others, nor love myself all on my own. I need other people to do so; I need others to help me learn, to share insight, to be there for me to love. I need to tell my story.

        My story is important not because it is mine, God knows, but because if I tell it anything like right, the chances are you will recognize that in many ways it is also yours. Maybe nothing is more important than that we keep track, you and I, of these stories of who we have met along the way because it is precisely through these stories in all their particularity, as I have long believed and often said, that God makes himself known to each of us most powerfully and personally.

Perhaps caring for myself and others comes into play as I tell my story. The act of telling my story begins to help me know it a bit better. I also begin to see God’s story throughout my story as I tell it. And as others engage with my story, I get to participate not only in their response to it and gain insight, gain perspective, and not be alone. Ultimately, telling my story and having others engage with it becomes a place of love – and thus, a place for fulfilling the commandments. Loving God and loving others – and loving myself – is the call of the Church. This is what the Church is supposed to be.

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Yet we are alone creatures, especially we modern-day Western Americans. We prize our individuality and independence. We are convinced we need no one, and at the same time are gravely afraid that we are alone. We keep our secrets to ourselves, persuaded that we are unique in our depravity and that ultimate rejection would ensue were we to expose ourselves.

        And so, questions remain: How? Where? In what way? With whom? Where is there really a safe place – the Church – to begin to learn to tell my own story, to have others engage with it, and even to ...

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