Dmitri Gurov’s flawed and shadowed perspective of the world is the product of his bitter relationship with his wife. He often speaks of her with a passive aggressive resentment fueled by his years seemingly stuck in a loveless marriage. She is described as an upstanding, self-proclaimed intellectual. He admits to being intimidated and fearful of her, clearly signifying his lesser position in his marriage. It seems that he is bullied emotionally by his spouse, and would easily name her as the reason he “did not like being at home,” (14) and had relations with other women. Incorporating change into his once redundant life schedule adds excitement to his meaningless existence, and yet he still refers to this ‘change’ and solution as “the lower race” (14). In paragraph 5 Dmitri shines a light on his negative outlook, stating that, “every intimacy, which at first so agreeably diversifies life and appears a light and charming adventure, inevitably grows into a regular problem of extreme intricacy, and in the long run the situation becomes unbearable”(14). One could analyze this quote and assume that Dmitri did once truly love his wife. Of course, time seemed to turn the love into oppression. To escape his complicated and burdened life, he runs away from it: “this experience seemed to slip out of his memory, and he was eager for life, and everything seemed simple and amusing” (21). Dmitri is unable to feel idealistic emotions as such in his regular life, surrounded by his wife, children, and work. Therefore, he seeks alternative ways to experience a life he so desires by starting over with new women to share such adventures with. Dmitri’s low self-esteem stemming form his relationship with his wife is a reason he reduces women as a whole.
Realizing his inferior role within his marriage, Dmitri Gurov creates other relationships to reestablish his manhood and keep himself entertained. Dmitri makes a point about his desire to play the dominant role in all of his interactions and relationships: “In the society of men he was bored and not himself, with them he was cold and uncommunicative” (14). This shows that he is uncomfortable and out of touch when he is unable to maintain the position of control. However, he speaks of his interactions with the opposite-sex differently. Dmitri is described somewhat as a player who, “knew what to say to them and how to behave; and he was at ease with them when he was silent” (14). With years of conditioning, Dmitri has been able to convince himself that all women (aside from his wife) are ranked lower than he. Therefore, he always feels powerful and in control when surrounded by them, which in turn making him feel comfortable and at ease. Unable to reposition this same status within his marriage, Dmitri searches for his manhood in these other ways. Examining Dmitri’s behaviors beyond face value gives a reader a more in depth insight to his personality. His natural instincts leads him to have affairs and thrive like the man he wants to be but is unable to in the other aspect of his life.
Upon meeting Anna, Dmitri seems to think of her as just another woman with whom he could enjoy the casual companionship of. She is simple, middle aged, and he notes that he finds nothing quite extraordinary or special about her. However, he finds himself mysteriously drawn to her features, noticing and appreciating the different aspects of her appearance and mannerisms. She remains ever present on his mind, and it becomes obvious that, despite what he believes, he is falling for her. However, in the passage when he has spent time recalling such details about Anna, he ends his thoughts by saying, “there is something pathetic about her anyway” (15). It is clear he doesn’t truly believe this, but he expresses this thought to clear the unwanted feelings of affection creeping in. He attempts to regain himself by reduce her the same way he has other women. Subconsciously, he connects loving someone to a total loss of control and power. Therefore he reaffirms weakness within Anna so he still has an advantage over her. It comes from a well-instilled belief that, because he lost his control by being overpowered by his wife, finding other women to overpower would be his only way of regaining that same control back. Falling for Anna is an uncomfortable thought, because she, theoretically, is the perfect candidate to support his choice of belief about women – he finds her simple and un-extraordinary. However, fall for her he does. By convincing himself that Anna is “pathetic anyways,” (15) he tries to maintain his upper hand. He is attempting to assign her a weakness of his choosing so he maintains his power and control over his relationship with women. If he falls for one, especially the plain Anna, it compromises his whole foundation of belief and his position in the world as according to him.
One of the determining factors, which affect a man’s connection with his masculinity, is the dynamic between him and the leading woman in his life. Dmitri has a negative view of women because in his most recognized relationship, his marriage, he is the lesser force. Dmitri has affairs with other woman, all the while speaking ill of them to maintain the belief that he can be better than some women, just by default. With this power, his manhood is reaffirmed and he feels free and comfortable within the companionship of women. He has affairs with women he feels are weaker than him in order to experience relationships in which he is able to feel in control.
