Kimi Kobal

COMM 103

Dr. Fritz

April 25, 2004

My Best Friend

My mother gave me the most useful advice for the relationship between my best friend Mike, and myself.  “A boy and girl can never be just best friends, because eventually they will fall for each other, maybe not on purpose, maybe not at the same time, and maybe forever.”  She summed up everything that would happen between us up until the forever.  Mike came to my high school when we were sophomores, along with his then best friend Marcus.  They transferred to my school to play football and I was instantly attracted to Marcus, so naturally I talked to Mike about it.  Little did I know then what the outcome of a small crush on his friend would lead to.  Although we have recently grown apart we have really been through it all and it has been the most dynamic relationship I have ever experienced.  I am almost positive that we no longer have a title of friends or anything else but I know that I will always be here for him and he will always be there for me.

In the beginning of our relationship my attraction to Mike was a social attraction as was his to me.  He was in a new school setting and did not know anyone so he wanted to get to know people.  I was physically attracted to his friend and wanted to get to know him better so I invited Mike and his friend into my circle of friends.  I knew that Mike played baseball so to get to know him better I joined the track team knowing that I would be staying after school with him because practice was at the same time.  Our proximity in the classroom led to our start of conversation.  We had one theology class together in which I sat near him and this is when I initiated conversation.  He told me that Marcus played baseball as well, knowing that we lived near one another and since neither him nor I drove yet he offered Marcus to bring me home if I ever needed a ride.

My relationship with Marcus began and ended while Mike was there for me the entire time.  Mike was a great listener.  He could tell when I just needed someone to vent to and was really good at neutral listening.  He was hearing about me and Marcus’ relationship from both sides of the story.  Other times he would listen and then give me advice and evaluate what was concerning me.  Either way he always knew what to do to make me feel better.  We grew really close over this time of my life and when things were over between Marcus and I my relationship with Mike really intensified.  After sophomore year was over Marcus went back to the school he came from and my first real crush was over.  This was also the end of Marcus and Mike’s friendship as Mike sided with me in the end of our relationship.  Mike stayed at my school and we were already so close from my relationship with Marcus that we remained acquaintances.  In the beginning of our new closeness he knew more about me than I did about him because he was hearing about me from Marcus and every time I had talked to him it was something about me and my feelings.  Our relationship took a big step and was intensified as we moved from acquaintances to friends.  We talked on the phone almost every night and started to hang out all the time.  He opened up to me and we talked about everything.  He knew everything about me and I knew everything about him.  This was the first time Mike let his open self known to me and told me things he had not told anyone else.  We had inside jokes and secrets that were just between us.  

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After this went on for a while other people began to notice our relationship and we were not easily identified without the other.  This is when we entered the integrating phase of our relationship.  If I was ever out somewhere without him I was asked at least five or six times where Mike was and why he was not with me.  If someone was trying to get a hold of him and for some reason he was not answering, I would get phone calls asking where he was.  A new common world was created when my family acknowledged Mike as ...

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