Here's what a star student thought of this essay
Quality of writing
The essay has a solid structure, with a clear introduction and conclusion. The quality of writing, however, is poor. The grammar is awkward and syntax is often wrong. Sentences such as "Lastly, impose tariff" only detract from what may be good analysis. Without a sophisticated style, examiners will be reluctant to give the top marks regardless of the content. For example "Secondly, the exchange rate position is directly affect the export and import." shows knowledge of the exchange rate and its significance, but the wording gives the impression that they don't understand fully.
Level of analysis
The analysis here is basic. Starting with the definition of a Balance of Payments deficit - this is wrong. They've described a current account deficit, and it is key that you are able to distinguish between the two. As a result, this essay focuses heavily on imports and exports, whereas it could also look at investment and speculation (looking at the inflation rate and stability of government). The paragraph detailing how a depreciation of the currency would work is okay, but I'd just like a bit more numerical analysis. Something as simple as saying Ã‚Â£1:$2 goes to Ã‚Â£1.00:$1.50 will mean British exports are less expensive (and a few accompanying calculations). The essay does well to pick up on structural problems, such as inefficient markets or poor quality products, but this paragraph doesn't get to the crux of the solution. It is essential to be clear in economics, and it's not obvious here that the essay is explaining how investment in education, technology, etc (a supply side policy) will improve this. I have a query with the conclusion. It is no good at A-Level to simply say "all policies together will be the best way forward" as this shows a complete lack of understanding. You should be weaving a justified judgement based on your evaluation, looking at what policy will be most effective for different situations.
Response to question
This essay has potential, as it covers the main points regarding a budget deficit. There is a discussion of the disadvantages of various policies, however there needs to be more evaluation. In my opinion, I would be evaluating what factors make the policies effective, using phrases such as "it depends upon" to clarify that all situations are not the same. A note of warning, however, is that examiners cannot award evaluation marks without sufficient analysis. This is evident here, as the essay does not fully explain how the policies will reduce the current account deficit. More analysis will ensure the perceptive evaluative comments seen here at times will not be discredited.