An ineffectual venture: Attempting to counter discontentment through infidelity. This sentiment is reflected in Milan Kunderas The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Michel Gondrys Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Oscar Wilde
Julie Lee
Mr. Dewar
English Senior Thesis
An ineffectual venture: Attempting to counter discontentment through infidelity
Individuals in modern relationships are frequently dissatisfied with their romantic situation, as they feel like they can achieve something “better”. As a result, these individuals seek something more, often by committing adultery; these individuals feel they can escape their current reality and instead find something more to their “satisfaction”. However, these individuals soon realize that trying to achieve perfection is futile, as it is only the pursuit of affairs and the associated secrecy that make the love “exciting”. This sentiment is reflected in Milan Kundera’s The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Michel Gondry’s Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Oscar Wilde’s Lady Windermere’s Fan, as individuals in a relationship will inevitably develop a sense of ennui, arising from dissatisfaction or discontentment with commitment to their partner; this manifests in secret acts of adultery, which ultimately cause unhappiness for all individuals involved.
For instance, in The Unbearable Lightness of Being, the main character Tomas has a string of lovers, who bring him only temporary happiness; when he marries, this strains his relationship with his wife, Tereza, and makes her continually suspicious of. Tomas calls his relationship with his mistresses “erotic friendships”, as they “do not pretend to be “love” affairs; he is able to move among many women without betraying any of them” (Galens 2003). However, not even this can ease his loneliness, as even “after making love [Tomas has] an uncontrollable craving to be by himself” (Kundera 13-14). In addition, Tomas enjoys the premise of adultery, since “once [his mistresses] are gone they assume a pleasing poetic existence that can be enjoyed at will without the endless accommodations that any real relationship involves” (Kimball 1986). Evidently, Tomas enjoys the lack of commitment. Franz is another character that engages in adultery; he shares Tomas’ mistress, Sabina. Unlike Tomas, who occasionally thinks of Tereza with guilt, Franz “[enjoys] the lying and hiding: it was all so new to him” (Kundera 112). When Franz realizes his wife, Marie-Claude, knew about his adultery all along, Sabina breaks off her relationship with Franz. The initial purpose of Franz’s infidelity was to escape commitment to Marie-Claude, and after that, the secrecy perpetuated the excitement. Therefore, adultery is only a false attempt at breaking boredom and achieving happiness, as “the first betrayal is irreparable. It calls forth a chain reaction of further betrayals, each which takes [the individual] farther and farther away from the point of our original betrayal” (Kundera 92). The characters in the novel attempt to resolve their unhappiness and reduce their boredom to commitment by engaging in adultery, but find themselves no less happier than before.
