Unrequited love is presented through conversations, highlighting the weakness of the male characters. In Hardy’s novel, during an interaction between Bathsheba and Oak regarding a proposal of marriage, the reader is presented with a male who is shown as being the weaker character. At some stage in this exchange, Oak says, “I shall do one thing in this life...and keep wanting you till I die,” which Hardy describes as a “genuine pathos,” portraying Oak’s ingrained love for Bathsheba. Hardy evokes sympathy towards Oak, by using emotive descriptions such as “a deep honest sigh,” as a contrast to Bathsheba’s apparent “yawn to an inoffensive smallness.” Oak’s actions are contrasted with the way in which Bathsheba responds as she was “with a little distress...some means of escape from her moral dilemma,” From this, it can be seen that Bathsheba was untouched by Oak’s emotional declaration of his love, illustrating the imbalance between the two characters. Bathsheba is portrayed as being more experienced in this particular field, giving her an advantage over Oak in terms of her attitude to his emotional distress. Oak comes across as innocent and weak as he is unable to control his feelings. His vulnerability is evident as during the conversation, his “hands perceptibly trembled,” which contradicts with an earlier description portraying him as “a young man of easy motions,” demonstrating his anxiety when it comes to facing the woman he loves. Boldwood, another male character in Hardy’s novel has parallel feelings to those of Oak. His use of lengthy and emotional declarations of love such as, “My life is a burden without you...I want you to let me say I love you again and again,” to Bathsheba again appear to be ineffective, as he receives short and abrupt replies, and at one point she is described to have “answered nothing at all.”
The conversations in Shakespeare’s sonnets are unconventional as they are a declaration of the poet’s love, and as the reader does not get the opportunity to see a response. However, Shakespeare still conveys the weakness of the male character through the tone and language used. In Sonnet 140, the lines, “For I should despair, I should grow mad,” portrays his desperation for his lover and the reader begins to understand the inequity in the relationship. The quote suggests that his lover plays a huge role in the poet’s life, without whom he cannot function effectively. The words “despair” and “mad” are powerful, releasing a tone of desperation, longing for his love. He refers to his lover having a “proud heart,” which makes it harder for him to attain the love he is in need of. This is similar to Hardy’s novel as both male characters are desperate to have their love returned to them, however both females appear to be unsympathetic to their feelings. The two authors use the interchange as a tool to display the true nature and disparity between the two parties. This is illuminated in Congreve’s play, in Act One Scene One, when Mirabell and Fainall discuss Mirabell’s rejection by Millamant. During a game of cards with Fainall he is described as being “reserved” and “pulled out of humour,” suggesting that he is distraught, a similar portrayal to that of Oak and the poet after being let down by the women they love. As the conversation progresses between the audience learns that Mirabell’s change in attitude has been caused by the callous actions of Millamant, the woman he loves. The male’s weakness in matters of love is highlighted through this interchange.
