Holden's pursuit of unending childhood and eternal innocence does not end at vocabulary, however. Holden is unable to love, as well. In conversation with a friend, Holden notes that "[He] can never get really sexy- [he] [means] really sexy-with a girl…" (Salinger 148) His inability comes from a fear of sex, which he sees as a rite of passage into adulthood. When Holden later encounters graffito in his sister's school bearing the words "F☹☹☹ you," he even fantasizes about "[killing] whoever'd written it." (201) Holden has such a violent reaction to the graffito because "F☹☹☹ you" is the antitheses of innocence, degrading love to the act of coitus. The graffito is a reminder of the need to grow up, so Holden "[rubs] it off" (201) and erases the suggestion from both wall and mind. Thus, Holden remains safe from the corruption of adulthood once more (Shaw 4)
Upon learning of Holden’s various mental and emotional disabilities, one is driven to wonder how the death of a sibling could be so powerful as to disturb him. Holden’s childhood and upbringing provide many answers to this quandary. Holden idolizes his brother. Throughout the book, Holden will expound upon the virtues of Allie, saying that “God, he was a nice kid.” (Salinger 38) Of course, in Holden’s world, nothing good can last. Allie “got leukemia and died when [the Caulfields] were up in Maine, on July 18, 1946… [Holden] was only thirteen.” (38) To make matters worse, not only was Holden’s brother taken away from him at the tender age of thirteen, but Holden was unable to attend Allie’s funeral. The night Holden’s brother died, “[he] slept in the garage,… and… broke all the goddam windows with [his] fist, just for the hell of it.” () In addition to this display of complete despair and anger being a direct result of the death of Allie, Holden goes as far as to justify his actions By saying that “It was a very stupid thing to do, I’ll admit, but I hardly didn’t even know I was doing it, and you didn’t know Allie.” (39) This action, however, did far much more harm than good. As a result of his injury, on the day of his brother’s funeral, “[He] wasn’t there. [He] was still in the hospital.” (155) Because of his inability to attend the funeral of his brother, Allie still remains unburied to Holden, both from the ground and from his mind. As such, Allie still lives in Holden, forever young and innocent. Allie is one of two people who have attained perpetual childhood, and stands as an ideal for Holden to strive for. Of course, striving for such an ideal is striving for death, which is where Holden’s fascination stems from.
The other character that remains forever young to Holden is his childhood friend, Jane Gallagher. Their families belonged to the same country club, and Holden would often play checkers with Jane. Holden reminisces about Jane’s habit of not moving her kings, saying that “What she’s do, when she’d get a king, she wouldn’t move it. She’d just leave it in the back row. She’d get them all lined up in the back row. Then she’d never use them. She just liked the way they looked when they were all in the back row.” This, according to Peter Shaw, is beautiful symbolism equating kings in the back row to an unwillingness to engage in sexual relations. (Shaw 3) And once again, because of this virtue that Holden sees in Jane, he idolizes her, saying that he “couldn’t get her off [his] mind. [He] really couldn’t.” (32-33)
Holden’s unwillingness to grow up is manifested in his reluctance to achieve in school. Upon taking his History mid-term examination, Holden is aware that he is failing, so he writes a note to his teacher, Mr. Spencer. “"Dear Mr. Spencer... It is all right with me if you flunk me though as I am flunking everything else except English anyway." (Salinger 12) Holden sees school, not unlike sex, as a one way street to adulthood. As such, Holden chooses to resist growing up by doing poorly in school. Allie's death, Jane's quirk, and Mr. Spencer's history examination all happened within a relatively lengthy period of time.
Following Holden’s expulsion from Pency Preparatory School, Holden’s problems are
aggravated frequently. His obsession with death is amplified to a near-ludicrous point after he reads a magazine article on cancer. “I’d had this sore on the inside of my lip for about two weeks. So figured I was getting cancer… I figured I’d be dead in a couple of months because I had cancer. I really did. I was even positive I would be.” (196) Here, Holden’s obsession with all things morbid hits a climax. Holden goes from imagining his own death to being completely sure of his approaching death.
Holden’s inability to love is shown more boldly than ever when he refuses to have sexual intercourse with a strumpet. Holden explains that “The trouble was, I just didn’t want to do it. I felt more depressed than sexy, if you want to know the truth.” (96) As stated before, Holden sees copulation as an irreversible step towards adulthood. As such, Holden prevents himself from engaging in such an act in order to remain young and retain his innocence. Here, we see Holden’s unwillingness to grow up and inability to love coinciding.
Holden’s unwillingness to grow up is further demonstrated when Holden is nearly rehabilitated by a respected teacher, Mr. Antolini. Antolini warns Holden of a “terrible, terrible fall…The man falling isn’t permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom.” (186-87) This warning is heeded, along with comforting words that Holden will
“find that [he is] not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as [he is] right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. [He’ll] learn from them--if [he wants] to." (189)
Antolini shows Holden a light at the end of the tunnel, and a possible path for rehabilitation, but this comfort is too much for Holden to handle, and Antolini is in for a terrible fall from the grace Holden’s mind affords him. That night, Holden stays with the Antolinis. He awakens from sleep to find Antolini “sitting on the floor right next to the couch, in the dark and all, and he was sort of petting [Holden]… on the goddam head.” (192) This act was taken to be a sexual advance by Holden, who reacted in a knee-jerk manner and left the Antolini apartment in a hurry. Antolini’s action nullifies Holden’s chance for salvation, as his advice becomes meaningless to Holden. What once were words of a wise and respected teacher become the words of another phony adult, trying to corrupt Holden. (Seng 3)
In a bleak world with no true heroes or respected people, there is little hope for a healthy state of mind. So it is for Holden Caulfield, whose only role model is his deceased younger brother, Allie. Holden strives to be like Allie, and in striving, Holden deprives himself of both an education and copulation, all in the name of preserving innocence. In addition, because Holden never received total closure regarding his brother’s death, Holden is obsessed with death and dying. The death of Allie has been traumatizing for Holden, and if he is to recover from the trauma, Holden must move on from his perpetual state of grieving for Allie, and into adulthood. It is a harrowing journey, indeed. However, it is one that Holden and every adolescent must travel.
Works Cited
Miller, Edwin Haviland. "In Memoriam: Allie Caulfield in The Catcher in the Rye." 1982: 129-140. Gale Infotrac Literature Resource Center. North Penn High School Library. Lansdale, PA. 24 March 2002. <http://infotrac.galegroup.com/menu>
Salinger, J.D. The Catcher in the Rye. Boston: Little Brown, & Co., 1951.
Seng, Peter J. "The Fallen Idol: The Immature World of Holden Caulfield" 1961 : 203-209 Gale Infotrac Literature Resource Center. North Penn High School Library. Lansdale, PA. 24 March 2002. <http://infotrac.galegroup.com/menu>
Shaw, Peter "Love and Death in The Catcher in the Rye" 1991 : 97-114 Gale Infotrac Literature Resource Center. North Penn High School Library. Lansdale, PA. 24 March 2002. <http://infotrac.galegroup.com/menu>
