Why are you late? I have been waiting for you since morning. I woke up with sunshine, and I prepared everything. I cleaned your room

I know you are sad and upset at your father; because he did not ask about you since you were born, as he forgot he had a son here. You made me remember the past, when I was the best lady in the town and your father was one of its best men. We met and our hearts did too. When your father asked his family to come to propose they argued and refused. How can a son of a noble family marries a normal girl who comes from a poor family, how can he let all the noble girls to marry a girl who lives in a mud room with her family?

Why you are late? The sun is about to set and you did not come, everything is ready, I placed the wood table and the chair under the graprine tree. I made a pot of tea. I know you are not coming alone and your friends are coming with you as usual and you will gather with them around the teapot reading poems, talking about the town affairs and arguing in politics. You are glowing among them when you speak in passion and confidant and I see you as a prince among his cortege.

Why were you late? Why did you leave me all lone? You know that sad memories are surrounding me when I am being lonely in the midnight. Don’t leave me to and to obsession and concerns. Here it is the clock chimes 1 A.M, and I am afraid that the dawn will break and I will start a new journey of waiting. I’m afraid that the sunshine will face me, and find myself alone facing the hard truth. That you are not exist and you are not coming, and your father had accept his family decision; the family that did not agree on our marriage only under one condition which was keeping the pure blood by not having a child from a farmer parent.

I am afraid to face the hard truth that I was running away from, for thirty years. And I realized it only after waking up in the hospital after a surgery and the doctor has removed my uterus.