Descriptive writing

As we all waited in line to go into the concert there was a thrill of excitement in the air. I was standing there with two of my friends when we saw a few other people we knew. “ Hey, come over here!” I bellowed. Three tall gothic boys slouched over to us. As we were talking the line started to move in an uneasy shuffle. We neared the entrance, where a tall bouncer with a voice that rumbled like thunder was standing. He asked for our tickets and in unison we passed them to him. He checked our tickets, nodded a curt nod and let us through.

The only light in the room came from onstage and there were only about 20 people in the mosh pit. Surrounding the mosh pit were metal bars, then a few steps. To the back there was a balcony curving around the room and then under that there were all the merchandising stalls. We wandered into the mosh pit; we were only a few metres away from the stage. There was a hum of voices as more people filed in. After 15 minutes people were starting to get frustrated because nothing was happening. Suddenly there was activity onstage and the lights dimmed the first support band, Slam Cartel came on. The mosh pit went wild, jumping, pushing and head-banging. In all this chaos I suddenly felt out of breath, we all clambered out of the pit and onto the steps.

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One of my friends kept asking me if I was ok and I said that I felt really out of breath and had a sharp pain in my chest. We came to the conclusion that I had probably cracked a rib. Surprisingly it didn’t actually hurt that much! By this time Slam Cartel had finished their set.

After a few minutes we went over to merchandising stand and Slam Cartel were all standing there and talking. We went over to them and we got their autographs and I got a hug from the lead singer and a cheek-to-cheek kiss ...

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