Here's what a star student thought of this essay
Quality of writing
Overall the quality is impressive, there are a few grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, but these are few and far between. It is nice to see that the student has used a variety of linking words rather than repetition of the same ones (e.g. pourtant, de plus, cependant), and uses some impressive, complex phrases such as Ã¢â‚¬Ëœne peut ÃƒÂªtre rÃƒÂ©solu qu'en, Ã¢â‚¬Ëœsi on ne fait rienÃ¢â‚¬â„¢, and Ã¢â‚¬Ëœon doit agir immÃƒÂ©diatement avant qu'il soit trop tardÃ¢â‚¬â„¢. It would have been nice to see the use of phrases such as Ã¢â‚¬Ëœil me semble queÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ to replace Ã¢â‚¬Ëœje pense queÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ on occasions. Overall, however, the French language reflects a high standard of work.
Level of analysis
Again the level of analysis demonstrated is of a very high standard. The student uses examples to clearly demonstrate their knowledge in the area and only uses concise, relevant information to support their discussion - for example, Tchernobyl en 1986 & La Hague. Both the introduction and the conclusion are of good quality; introductions are important since they provide the first impressions of the entire essay, they should therefore give insight into what will be discussed as demonstrated by the sentence here Ã¢â‚¬Å“d'une part, les risques environnementaux et d'autre part des aspects politiquesÃ¢â‚¬Â, and hint at what conclusion is reached (e.g. lÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ÃƒÂ©nergie nuclÃƒÂ©aire est encore plus importante parce que les ÃƒÂ©nergies fossiles sÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ÃƒÂ©puisent). Perhaps it would have been nice to explicitly state that there are advantages and disadvantages to the use of nuclear energy in the introduction, as this would lead into the studentÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s work precisely. Futhermore, the student finishes with a clear, concise, and personalised conclusion (e.g. En rÃƒÂ©sumÃƒÂ©, je crois queÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ actuellement je pense que cÃ¢â‚¬â„¢est la seule solutionÃ¢â‚¬Â¦). This is important since it shows the studentÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s ability to synthesize all the information discussed, not just for themselves but for the reader also, and also demonstrates their ability to add their own critical views on the subject rather than just relying on reproducing facts and figures. Providing personal insight into a topic is a marker of a high quality essay and can also indicate the studentÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s level of understanding of the work they have produced.
Response to question
A very solid piece of work demonstrating a high standard of written French language, and a well-structure essay. Although there is no specific question given, the topic area of nuclear energy in France has been addressed thoroughly and to a very high standard since the student provides good descriptive background information (E.g. il y a 58 rÃƒÂ©acteurs nuclÃƒÂ©aires en France qui fournissent 75% de leur ÃƒÂ©lectricitÃƒÂ©, cÃ¢â‚¬â„¢est le pays d'Europe qui ÃƒÂ©met le plus de gaz ÃƒÂ effet de serre) which is important to set the scene for the reader. They also supply a balanced argument to the benefits and disadvantages of nuclear energy (E.g. il ne produit pas de gaz ÃƒÂ effet de serre vs. les substances radioactives). The key to producing a good essay is showing that you have planned ahead and can objectively discuss both sides of an argument. The fact that this student stays focused and does not drift away from the topic throughout the entire essay demonstrates this further as it gives a clear, simple structure for the reader to follow Ã¢â‚¬â€œ a high quality essay will only include relevant information.