One day, Connie came to my home and told me: "Julia, I want to tell Jerry about my special feelings for him!"
"What?" I was so surprised.
"I want to tell Jerry I love him! What do you think?"
I really didn't know how to reply to her. Jerry is my old friend. I knew he hasn't got a girlfriend. He often says: "I won't have a girlfriend until I go to university. Now we are too young to understand what true love is. Only when I go to university can I find a girl who is really excellent and I really love." Both Connie and Jerry are my friends. They often meet each other. But the strange thing is that Jerry has never regarded Connie as a good friend. For some reason, he doesn't like her; he has never paid attention to Connie at all. I have never told this to Connie, I don't want to see Connie feel sad.
Connie looked very happy, very excited, what could I say?
"It's up to you, Connie. But Connie, please, think about it again, ok?"
“I have thought for a long time!" Connie shouted, "I must tell him, I must let him know there is a girl close to him who has fallen in love with him!"
I have never seen Connie so excited. I couldn’t break her heart. So I just said to her: " Good luck, Connie, I'll pray for you!"
Connie talked to me about Jerry for a long time. She told me she had a very good impression of Jerry at first sight; why and how much she loves him, … At that time, I had no idea about how to explain to her. I was wondering what would happen next?
Connie didn't tell Jerry, because she had a car accident on the day after she came to my home. Her right leg was hurt and she couldn't move. A kind person who saw this accident sent her to a hospital. A doctor said that she needed to be in hospital for at least 1 month. During this time, I often went to the hospital to see her. Every time, she seemed unhappy. She said to me that it was really boring to stay there. Sometimes she felt very lonely. She was longing to see Jerry.
"Do you know, Julia, if Jerry can come to see me, even only once, I'll feel very happy! I'm sure that is better for me than the medicine."
I could feel the love was hurting her, even more than she could say. At last, I decided to help her.
Next day, I went to school and found Jerry. I asked him to see Connie. He looked at me as if I was a stranger to him, then asked me: "Why?"
"Because… because she loves you!" I told him the true reason.
At first, Jerry looked very surprised, and then he shook his head and said: "No!"
"Why?" I asked.
"Because I can't!” he said very seriously, "You know I don't want to have a girlfriend now. Even if I did want one, that girl wouldn't be Connie. You know that in my mind, Connie is just a friend of my best friend. I can't remember whether I've talked with her. What she sees is just my outside. She doesn't know what I think, and she doesn't know what I really am. If you want me to see her, I will do. But it's just because you are my best friend rather than love.
I still wanted him to see Connie, and said: " She has loved you for a long time, although you do not like her, you still can go to the hospital to say something to her, which will make her happy."
"I could go to the hospital and talk with her, I could even lie to her that I love her, but do you think it is fair for her? Is that good for her?"
He paused for a moment, and then continued, "You are my best friend, so I can tell you there is no space for Connie in my heart!"
At the moment, I was sure Jerry wouldn't go to see Connie.
"I'm sorry, it doesn't mean I am forcing you to love her, I just..."
"I see," he said, "OK, you know all my feelings now. Don't worry. Just forget the whole thing. See you later." He went away.
"Julia," a person was running towards me; it was Jamie, "Please tell me if Connie is all right? " From his face I could see he was really worried about Connie, "Can you tell me which hospital she is in now?" Jamie was eager to see Connie. I told him the address of the hospital.
Jamie is a good boy. After he knew Connie was hospitalized and got the address from me, he went to the hospital everyday, even the doctor said he has never seen a person who comes to the hospital to see a patient as often as Jamie does. Jamie looked after Connie very carefully. He told Connie many interesting things to make her feel happy. He taught Connie the lessons, which Connie missed. He bought Connie her favorite flower—lilac, every single day. He tried to do everything he could do.
Human beings are very complicated. Nobody can totally understand what people think when they fall in love.
On Wednesday, I went to see Connie after school. When I opened the door, Connie was looking out of the window.
"Connie," I called her. She turned to me. I saw she looked very tired.
"How are you?"
"Not good."
"What's the matter?"
"Because of Jerry and Jamie."
"I see, how do you think now?" I asked her with great care.
"Now I come to realize that I'll never win Jerry's love. He hasn't ever cared about me and he will never think of me, I couldn't even become his friend. James has become important to me. During these days, he has made me feel happy. When I stay with him, I feel relaxed. He has become my best friend, but not boyfriend. I still can't try to love him. Just like me, no matter what I do, Jerry can't love me. But in my heart, Jerry is still the boy I love."
"But you need to make a choice! You can't always be in pain over it.”
"Yes, I know that, but how and what can I do? " Connie looked out of the window again.
I saw that tears were flowing down on her face.
Connie got married 11 years later. Who was the bridegroom? Neither Jerry nor Jamie, but he is Connie's colleague.
For love, if you are unable to make a choice, please choose to give up.
