At the time of Mr Darcy’s first proposal, Elizabeth has just heard that he is responsible for the separation of Jane and Mr Bingley. Due to what Wickham has told her, Elizabeth also thinks that the bad treatment Wickham has received is also all Mr Darcy’s fault. Therefore in his proposal when he starts insulting her family, “could you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your connections” it is not surprising that Lizzy rejects him. His general pride and disagreeable character, his arrogance, conceit and selfish disdain for the feeling of others mean that he is the “last man in the world I could ever marry”. This is particularly ironic as when Elizabeth learns the truth about Mr Darcy and Wickham, her attitudes towards Darcy change to the opposite, and towards the end of the novel Elizabeth finds herself wishing that he would readdress his proposals of marriage to her, as she has fallen in love with him.
The relationship between Mr and Mrs Bennet is quite extraordinary because they are totally different people and lead very separate lives. Mrs Bennet is desperate for her girls to marry for status and wealth, and does not really mind if love is not an issue. This is emphasised in the quotation “If I could see but one of my daughters happily settled at Netherfield, and all the others equally well married, I will have nothing to wish for”. This shows the general attitude of mothers to daughters in the gentry in this time period, to see their girls well married and provided for, especially if they were unable to have sons. When they first meet Mr Bingley at the assembly rooms in Meryton, Mrs Bennet immediately notices the attraction between him and her eldest daughter. Even though they are not engaged, at the Netherfield Ball Lizzy notices that “her mother was talking to Lady Lucas … expectation to see Jane married to Mr Bingley”. This shows the mothers’ role in society and also shows that Mrs Bennet is a hindrance rather than a help in marrying the girls off.
Mr Bennet, on the other hand is more willing for the girls to marry for love. As he tells Lizzy “let me not have the grief of seeing you unable to respect your partner in life”. This would suggest that hi own marriage is not a happy one for him. Both of Mr and Mrs Bennet’s attitudes to marriage become clear when Lizzy refuses to marry Mr Collins. Mrs Bennet is convinced that she should marry him so that the estate can then be entailed onto her when Mr Bennet dies. However Mr Bennet says to Elizabeth “From this day you must be a stranger to one of your parents. Your mother will never see you again if you do not marry Mr Collins, and I will never see you again if you do”. It is obvious from this that he believes that his favourite daughter Elizabeth should marry for love. When it is discovered that Charlotte Lucas is to be the wife of Mr Collins, he expresses his surprise to discover that Charlotte, “whom he used to think tolerably sensible, was as foolish as his wife”, which proves the above point that he feels it wise to marry for love.
Charlotte Lucas’ view that “happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance” is a sharp contrast to that of Elizabeth. She does not believe in marrying for love, but for money and a comfortable home. Charlotte is said to be plain looking and in serious danger of becoming an old maid at the age of twenty seven. It is not surprising then that she accepts Mr Collins’ proposal, much to the surprise of the Bennet family. She says to Lizzy “I am not romantic you know, I never was …” conveying that she believes Mr Collins is her best chance for a reasonably happy future. Charlotte is very patient and is able to tolerate Mr Collins therefore her marriage is not unhappy. Near the beginning of the novel we think it is strange that Jane should “secure Bingley”, even before she knows that she is in love with him, but we later learn that Charlotte’s judgement is right and wise. Jane does not show enough affection for Bingley, so it all ends up as nothing. Part of Elizabeth’s stay at Hunsford was to see for herself whether or not Charlotte made a mistake in marrying Mr Collins. She certainly shows herself able to tolerate the disadvantages of her existence with dignity and kindness. She is entirely without self-pity, and refers to her comfort in a nice house and a respectable clergyman for a husband.
“A conceited, pompous, narrow-minded, silly man” is the opinion that we form of Mr Collins, after reading his long rambling letters and hearing of his monotonous reading voice of Fordyce’s Sermons. His views on marriage are singular, and shown in his proposal (which was then refused) to Elizabeth. We are not to believe that he is marrying for status and money, because he only wishes to fulfil the wishes of his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, “Twice has condescended to give me her opinion … ‘Mr Collins, you must marry’”. He is amazed that Elizabeth refuses him, due to his advantageous connection with the de Bourgh family. I do not think that he believes that love comes before marriage, more like marriage should come first, love can come later. Mr Collins does not really mind who he marries, just as long as she is suitable for Lady Catherine’s tastes. He jumps quickly from Jane to Elizabeth, and because “his regard for her was quite imaginary”; he is not really affected by being refused by Lizzy, and again changes his advances towards Charlotte Lucas whom he then marries.
Although Jane is the eldest of the Bennet girls, her true opinions of marriage are not conveyed as much as the others. However it is clear that she wants to marry for love, as she advises Elizabeth not to marry without love, but feels that she must also marry someone rich, as she is the eldest child. She is attracted to Mr Bingley and is greatly admired by him. However she is unsure of what he thinks about her so is nervous about showing him more affection. She confides in Lizzy that she loves Bingley, but does nothing to tell him. Charlotte Lucas was correct – she should have shown Mr Bingley more affection to “secure him” and prevent him from returning and staying in London. In Elizabeth’s long letter from Darcy it is revealed that he did not think that Jane had strong feelings for Mr Bingley because she did not show them. He explains his belief that Jane was “indifferent” to Bingley.
Lady Catherine de Bourgh is a very narrow-minded woman determined for Mr Darcy to marry her own daughter, Miss Anne de Bourgh. “Mr Darcy is engaged to my daughter, now what do you have to say?” Lady Catherine tries to convince Lizzy of this but is then forced to admit that their engagement was a peculiar kind and that really they were only “intended” for one another. The point of Lady Catherine’s visit to Longbourn was merely to warn Elizabeth away from Mr Darcy, but if anything she brought them closer together. Hearing that Mr Darcy might propose to her again gives Lizzy hope that she will be able to marry him. Lady Catherine does not believe Elizabeth worthy enough of Mr Darcy as she is very much inferior to him. She does not believe that Elizabeth would wish “to quit the sphere” in which she had been brought up in. However it is clear that Elizabeth would do anything to marry Mr Darcy as she believes they are equals (“He is a gentleman, I am a gentleman’s daughter: so far we are equal”). Lady Catherine believes that if they were to marry, Lizzy would “disgrace him in the eyes of everybody”.
There are several different reactions to the engagement of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth. Mr Bennet at first questions Lizzy’s love for Mr Darcy. He knows her very well and says “I know that you could be neither happy nor respectable unless you truly esteemed your husband”. He warns her of the dangers of an unequal marriage and tells her “let me not have the grief of seeing you unable to respect your partner in life”, this shows that Mr Bennet takes love in a marriage very seriously. Elizabeth has to work quite hard with him to point out Mr Darcy’s good qualities and eventually he accepts them. Mrs Bennet is quickly won over by a moment’s thought about Darcy’s wealth. She is soon dwelling on how rich Elizabeth will become, and how handsome and charming the ‘disagreeable Darcy’ has suddenly turned out to be. Finally she wishes to know what Darcy’s favourite food is: money, appearances and food preoccupy her, all relative trivialities for Elizabeth and Austen.
Georgiana is delighted at her brother’s marriage and with her new sister, but is if a little shocked at how sometimes Lizzy took great liberties in talking with him in a “lively, sportive manner”.
We learn at the end that Lady Catherine finally forgives Mr Darcy and eventually calls at Pemberly due to her endless curiosity of how his wife conducted herself as mistress of Pemberly.
In my opinion, Elizabeth and Darcy are the only characters who develop in the novel. Darcy is able to overcome his pride and disdainful exterior to tolerate Elizabeth’s family and friends. Elizabeth was able to admit to herself that her first impressions of Wickham and Darcy were wrong. A key passage in reviewing Lizzy’s growth is in chapter thirty-six, when we see her painfully coming to terms with her mistaken judgement of Wickham whilst reading Darcy’s letter. She has to take in information which contradicts her prejudiced judgements – in doing so she realises that she is not such a good judge of character as she had so confidently supposed before. During the novel Elizabeth’s attitudes to marriage do not change at all – she will only marry for love. At his first proposal, Darcy’s pride means that he expects Elizabeth to accept him, due to the wealth and status that he has and she needs. He has to realise that she will only marry him if she can grow to love him as much as he loves her. His attitudes to marriage change after rejection at the first proposal.
In conclusion, attitudes to marriage would seem to depend on social status and wealth. Those with social status and wealth would seem to look for the same things in a partner first, with love coming second, as seen in Lady Catherine’s preference for her own daughter to marry Mr Darcy rather than Elizabeth. However those without wealth or high social standing, such as Jane and Elizabeth Bennet (although Elizabeth would dispute her lack of social status), would look for love and happiness first. Some, such as Mrs Bennet see marriage only as a way of increasing wealth and social standing. The union of Elizabeth and Darcy is remarkable as they marry purely for love – going against the social traits of the time.