Four months later my grandpa followed her to Wales. It seemed at the time of my grandma’s departure that she would be back before long. How very wrong, my grandma and grandpa would not be seen for four long years. It was bad enough that I didn’t see my mum much, but now my surrogate parents were gone. At the time I didn’t understand why they had left mum and me, but things started to change and I didn’t like it.
Now, Instead of getting up every morning to boiled eggs and marbles, I was now awakening to go to a child’s day care centre suitable for up to five year olds and under. I was always the first one through the doors in the morning and last one out in the evenings. Sometimes I was even there after closing due to my mum’s bus from the city breaking down or being late. It wasn’t her fault things were the way they were, I knew that but I was unhappy or angry, a similar emotion that I couldn’t name but over the years that unknown emotion simmered away deep down and one day in the future would be realised. 376
Three years had passed and I was now ten years old. the day care centre told my mum that I was getting too old for their facilities. What used to be five foot fence changed to a seven foot fence at the new place I attended. In a way it was better: inmates my own age, more room to move, but I still felt trapped and encaged, Much like an animal that has just been moved to a bigger enclosure.
This new place I attended was right across the road from a primary school. Kids my age would walk past on their way home and poke fun at us. I wanted to be normal. I didn’t want to have to get up at five in the morning, I didn’t want to go home at dark, I wanted to spend time with my mum. Everyday I only saw her for about four hours at the most and none of it was time where we had any fun or did anything together. To me it seemed like my life was a video; always being rewound to the same place, never going forwards. 559
I was so jealous of my friends. They didn’t know how lucky they were. They always had their mum waiting for them at home, with snacks and all the things mums would do for them. As I got older, I became more rebellious. I started questioning why I was constantly behind fences. Sometimes I was mischievous and sometimes I was upset. I couldn’t understand, I was now eleven and cooped up all the time.
I think my mum began to understand how upset I was when I was around eleven. As much as I wanted her to be there for me after school and as much as I wanted a father to come home after work like everyone else, I knew that would be impossible. But I knew that was out of reach and something out of my hands. It was hard for her, what with being a single parent with a mortgage, full time job and my grandparent’s possessions to look after. And that was to say the least.
One of my best friends at the time; Jay Terry used to live very close to me. We both attended the same primary school; Bungaree Primary. In a way we were both in the same boat. He used to come to the same daycare as me and he was also an only child with one parent, except he knew his mother and saw her frequently. I sometimes wondered about my dad, I wondered who he was what he did, I didn’t know or understand. Everyday his dad would let him ride to school and back. I always prayed that one day mum would let me go with him.
Not long before after I was eleven, my mum took me to a bike store in the town and bought me a brand new BMX. I was thrilled; my life seemed complete and soon after she told me that I didn’t have to go to daycare anymore, my parole had been signed. I was now allowed to get up in the morning later, when my mum had already gone to work, I would go with Jay every morning to school, cycle home with him, return home while my mum was still at work and best of all I was now free of tall fences and school kid’s taunts.
Not long after, my mum met a guy called Craig. He used to catch the same bus into the city as her. Ever since then they have been together. It was strange having someone that is like a father. Well to someone like me anyway.
Several years have passed since then and here I am today in a completely different country half way round the world. My mum doesn’t work anymore, and however simple it may seem there she is, everyday, after school at home doing what mums do. 1021
Josh Smith
