Now they are trying to mark us to identify us as Jews. Aliyah says that being Jew is something to be proud of and that I should not worry about wearing the armbands. We have to make them ourselves. Here is the newspaper telling us what we must do.
Things have got much worse since my last entry. We have to walk in the gutters as if we are rats. All Jewish books have to be burnt and the media is all controlled by the Germans, so I cannot own a diary as they don’t want us to exist. In the newspapers they printed a cartoon of father’s butcher shop. They made it look like father uses rats to make sausages, which is obviously a lie, but now business is running low. I have to go now; mother wants me to set the table. Write to you later, bye.
31st October 1940
Dear Diary,
Today we were informed of the dreaded move. This is the sign telling us what we have to do. As we don’t follow any of the exceptions today we shall move to the small ghetto.
There are 400,000 Jews in Warsaw and yet they are moving us to a place 2.4% of the size of Warsaw. It is obvious that we will only have a very small room to live in. I just hope we will stay together. Here is a map of the ghetto.
It is surrounded by walls 10 metres high, topped with barbed wire. It is a prison, a hell that we are being sent to, they are segregating us from the world. Like how aliens should be segregated from humans. I don’t know what I have done wrong to deserve this. I don’t know if I will ever return home. I will miss life here. I just know things are going to get worse, no matter what my sister might say.
23rd April 1941
Dear Diary,
I am starving. How can they think that we can survive on so little food? We are practically living on 1 slice of bread a day. Here we even have our own currency, as we aren’t part of the normal world any more. The richer folk are still living in luxury with their cafes and plenty of food. Some people are selling goods on the black market and are able to live very well. The Nazis are organising some food to be given to us every day. Mother has to wait for 7 hours in a queue for cup full of soup to feed five of us. There are children on the street starving to death. Yesterday, I recognised 2 of them from my school. They were orphans; their parents were shot for smuggling food. The Nazis threaten us; they cold bloodedly kill for no reason. We are in constant fear for our lives. It becomes unbearable. Sometimes, I feel as it was my fault and that I deserve all that is happening.
11th July 1941
Dear Diary,
The Jewish council in our ghetto are organising secret schools, so that we can learn. The school is disguised as soup kitchen. It is on the other side of the ghetto. So I have to go past the dreadful crossing where the Nazis humiliate us. We have to go 2 hours early as the train times are not fixed. We only have simple lessons which are not fixed as sometimes they are cancelled. Going to school makes life feel more normal. However it is different to normal school as we are always afraid. We try to keep our spirits up but it is always hard. Sometimes we go to the busy crossing just to listen to the symphony orchestra play. There are many activities that my parents can go to. For example, the entertainment at the local cafe. This poster is an advert for a music night at the café at the corner of the road.
18th December 1941
Dear Diary,
We are still able to carry on with our religion secretly. We can still celebrate our religious festivals; however we have to keep on close guard. Celebrating important religious festivals is helpful in keeping the Jewish resistance going as it helps restore faith in god and in our religion, and it makes us strongly believe and trust our faith. It helps to make doubts go away and we feel safe when we pray. It makes us remember we are not alone and together we can get through this difficult time. The ghetto is very crowded and many people come to the secret prayers. To help keep control of the crowd there is a Jewish police to help the Nazis. They are just as bad as the Nazis and treat us as Jews. Mother says they are animals who deny their true faith.
10th February 1942
Dear Diary,
Rumours are circulating that the small ghetto we live in is about to be closed down. All the people who don’t have a work permit will be sent to labour camps in the east. We will be treated as slaves. To avoid this father has gone to the people at the head office and got us all permits so we don’t have to be moved. I hope that if we die we will at least die at the end just to see Hitler get what he deserves. This is a poster in the streets helping us to keep our spirits up.
7th march 1942
Dear Diary,
Today the streets had many dead corpses. We all walked along as if this was normal. Then it hit me that we were lifeless and lost all sense of feeling. I discovered that it was not just me but everybody had got used to seeing the most horrific scenes. Nonetheless, today I saw the most disturbing scene. The family from next door, shown below in the picture,
Were killed by the drunken Nazis. They were sitting in the street when 2 drunken soldiers walked past. They ordered the family to stand up, but as they were crippled by hunger, they could not stand up. So with no thought whatsoever, they shot the entire family. But what was the most disturbing was how they shot the baby as if it was a ball. One of the Nazis threw the baby in the air and the other shot it while it was in the air. I screamed but mother covered my mouth with her hand and we had to walk away.
16th march 1942
Dear Diary,
We now have to leave the small ghetto to go to the warehouse. This is different from the last time we left home as we now expect it much worse. This is the sign telling us what we must do and take.
We can only take possessions that are practical. I asked mother if I could take my diary. She said no at first, but I told her it is the only thing that will keep my spirits up, so she agreed. This time it is much more frightening because I may be separated from my family.
3rd May 1942
Dear Diary,
We now work in the warehouse. We have to handle the belongings of the Jewish people who have been sent to the work camps in the east. I do not think that they have been actually sent to the work camps because if they had then why are we getting rid of their belongings, wouldn’t they need them there. This piece of newspaper I have found proves my point. We are now living with 5 other families in a small cramped room. We sleep in bunk beds and the mattresses are a couple of inches thick. We have to keep quiet and cannot argue or be heard moaning. Tonight we learnt that we were now selected to go to the labour camps in the east. I am more scared than ever before. What if all my thoughts were true and we were going to be killed. There are many rumours going around that the Nazis are trying to exterminate us as if we are rats.
7th August 1942
Dear Diary,
As we are now waiting for the transport to take us to the camps in the east, we are weak and frail and have no clue of what is going to happen. Many people around us are crying and wailing out for help. We are all praying to God to show mercy. But God is silent and does not answer. I hope I am kept together with my family. The Jewish policeman says it will be a better life but somehow I do not believe him. This is an identity card I found on the floor, who knows what happened to this man as he waited to be deported. I cannot write anymore, there is no more time. I just hope this diary can live on and someone has the chance to read it and learn about how life was in the ghetto. I we all die, and then at least people can remember that we existed. We will be getting on to the train soon, who knows what faces us. I must say goodbye now. Farewell diary, you have allowed me to write my inner most thoughts and you have kept my spirits up in these troubled years in this prison that is the ghetto.
