But, some people say to really appreciate a person, is to live with them; because actions speak louder than words. You can really learn to love your partner more and learn how to tolerate them when you live together, and some people could say, that this could be a better start for a marriage.
You could get perplexed if you are in love with somebody or if you just have feelings of lust for them. If you and your partner are devoted together and you love each other, then you should be able to control unwanted desires until you are married. “Let every man have his own wife, and let every women have her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:2) Also love is much more than just sex.
If you feel that you and your partner have a strong sexual urge, then it is more than likely to be lust. If you just have feeling of lust for your partner, then this can lead to desirable sex which can lead to much deeper problems; if you are not in a committed relationship, but commit yourself to sex, this can lead to emotional damage. “Now to the unmarried and the windows I say: it is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry for it is better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:8-9).
The Catholic Church believes that sex is this wonderful gift given by God to all those who are married. When a couple is married it shows that they promise to be loyal and love each other forever in the presents of God. Marriage bonds a couple together by law and sex joins a couple physically and emotionally. The act of sexual intercourse has such a strong bonding effect that the bible describes sex as being, “A union of a man and women as for them to become, as it were one flesh or one body”. Sex within marriage has two purposes, one to produce offspring; the Catholic Church teaches that you must be “fruitful and multiply” (Gen 1:28). This is also means that the use birth control is prohibited. The other reason for sex is companionship “it is not good for the man to be alone”. (Gen 2:18)
But, some people could argue that you don’t have to be married to have sex. The only reason for marriage is to show your love by law, but sometimes marriage is a commitment that some people don’t want to be trapped in. Some couples feel that it’s best not to get married because they don’t need to show their love by law, or sometimes it might be impossible to get married because of their situation e.g. money or career. Couples should be able to express their love though sex even if there not married because sex doesn’t have to be a bonding between two people; it can be a fun and exciting without any law binding commitment. Many young couples are not practicing chastity because they want to show their affection for each other, because actions speak louder than words. Some people say that if a couple believes that they are ready to share their love in a more physical way; they should have every right to show that they are devoted to one another. If the couple are truly in love and it’s not just lust, then sex is a perfect way of showing devotion.
Sometimes it’s best to wait till after marriage to have sex for your own personal health. As we go in to the new century, we are seeing the highest figures ever of people getting an STD or being HIV positive. Sex outside of marriage is like playing Russian roulette. You never know when the gun will fire or the person has an STD. If everyone only had one sexual partner then the number of cases of STD and aids would be reduced. We are also seeing high figures for teenage pregnancies and abortions; with 39,003 teenage pregnancies cases in 2007 and a 48.9% of under 20 year olds pregnancies ending with abortion. If everyone waited till after they were married to have sex we would see a dramatic drop in the number of teenage pregnancies.
But waiting till after marriage to have sex could be quite boring; sex should be this pleasurable and entertaining action. We can all protect ourselves against STD’s and we can also protect ourselves against un-wanted pregnancies; so we can enjoy safe sex.
Sex can never be safe; when you chose to have sex it can open you up to many emotional and physical issues. When you have sex outside of a marriage it could lead to somebody being emotional hurt. When you have sex within a marriage there are still minor issues, but least you know you’re giving yourself to somebody who loves you and sex can be more about love and passion.
A sexual relationship is the closest two persons can get; this is why the Catholic Church teaches us that sex should be left until after marriage, so you can share your love in a more emotional way. The Catholic Church also teaches that sex should be a way in which new human beings come into the world; this is why you should wait until you’re in a permanent and committed relationship, which marriage is.
But other views show that sex doesn’t have to be serious; why wait till after marriage to have sex? Other views show that if you love someone and you want to share your love with them, then everyone should have the right to able to be express themselves in a personal way.
I feel that couples should decide what to do, for whatever is best for their situation; I personally feel that sex is a statement of love, and as long as you love your partner, then there is nothing wrong with having sex before marriage.
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