The acceptance of consent and blessing is essential in the catholic marriage ceremony that a priest is present, as he represents the people of God and the church, and accepts a mutual consent of the bride and groom. He says these words: "You have declared your consent before the church. May the lord in his goodness strengthen your consent and fill you both with his blessing. What god has joined let no man put asunder"
After this the rings are blessed by the priest with the words: ‘may the Lord bless these rings which you give to each other as a sign of your love and fidelity.’
Then the groom puts the ring on the third finger of the left hand of the bride and says "take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity in the name of the father of the son and the Holy Spirit"; the rings are used as a token of their promises to each other.
The marriage blessing is then given after the “out Father” of the mass has been said.
The signing of the marriage register then follows this; this takes place, as there are civil requirements for a marriage. The bride, groom and an authorized priest or registrar must be present at the ceremony and sign the register. A certificate is then given to the couple. This is done to show that they are legally married as well as married through the church.
Explain the main problems that face a Catholic family today?
There are numerous problems that can be faced when you are in a marriage. Some of these problems can affect catholic families more than a non believing family and be harder to resolve for them. This is because certain problems that could be faced are seen as a sin which makes it all worse for them.
“If anyone does not take care of his own relatives, especially his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” (1 Timothy 5:8). This quote puts into perspective what I am going to be talking about in this essay.
When I use the term “Catholic Family” I mean a couple that follow the catholic faith and who where married in a catholic church and live by the morals taught to Catholics; also the children they have brought into the world together.
I will now explain some of the hardships and problems that most families go through.
Adultery is a common problem faced by many families. Adultery is when one partner has an affair. This could cause some marriages to break but in some circumstances can be resolved. This problem may be easier to resolve for a non-catholic couple who believe in divorce; because they can simply file for a divorce and go their separate ways.
Whereas the Catholic Church does not see adultery as a reasonable excuse for divorce but they disapprove of adultery because it breaks the exclusive ideal of marriage. Instead the Catholic Church encourages forgiveness as Jesus taught in the woman caught in adultery (john 8:1-10). In this story Jesus teaches that every one sins therefore sinners shouldn't judge sinners. In response to this teaching the Catholic Church say's Catholics must find another way of resolving their problems concerning adultery.
I believe that if a catholic family was faced with this problem they would feel hurt and betrayed.
Another problem that families may face is children. People may think that the gift of children is a blessing but others find it hard to cope with kids and also others can simply not physically have kids. There are many reasons why a couple cannot have kids but the most common reason is because of infertility. Also this could be a problem because a family might not be able to cope with children maybe because of financial or housing problems. in addition if a woman falls pregnant with a child and she does not want it this will become a very bad problem for a catholic because the catholic church does not believe that abortion is right because it take away the life of a human being therefore out ruling one of the ten commandments “thou shall not kill”.
This problem would be a threat to the life giving exclusive of marriage because it says that we should accept children willingly from God.
I think if a catholic family was faced with such a problem that it would cause a lot of arguments for example if the woman wanted to keep the baby but the man did not this would bring about a lot of arguments which could lead to separation which is not aloud in the Catholic Church.
A different problem that a family could face is disagreements within the household; whether it is between parents and children or husband and wife. These disagreements could be anything from minor disagreements to major disagreements. However no matter how little the problem is it could escalate to a even bigger problem if they are not talked about; because if the family do not communicate with one another then everything will just be tense and make the problem become worse. If the problem becomes worse it could lead to a number of things such as separation, arguments over children, abuse, domestic violence or even lead them to depression, alcoholism or drug use.
These problems are all very serious and could take effort from everyone in the household to overcome them. The Catholic Church believes that by allowing these problems to grow you are breaking the ideals of marriage so the Catholic Church recommends talking about and overcoming such problems.
There are many other problems in families today which are also equally important such as, time issues, sexual problems, illness, falling out of love, not wanting or being unable to have children, financial problems and religious differences. These problems are usually associated with the permanent and life giving ideals of a catholic marriage. Issues like these can be more difficult for some couples to resolve than others. For example if a couple do not want children they could use a form of contraception to stop them having a baby. However a catholic couple could not do this because forms of contraception are not supported in the Catholic Church. This may lead to Catholics finding that they have to make tougher decisions than non-Catholics, as they may have to do certain things differently because of their beliefs.
Overall I believe that in today’s society Catholics may find it particularly hard to resolve problems in a religious manner. This is because I believe that Catholics are restricted to what they can do because of what the Catholic Church teaches. Because of these restrictions and as well as modern influences I think that this is the reason why interest and popularity in the Catholic Church is decreasing. Also people who are Catholics are not following all catholic teachings because of the modern influences.
How do Catholics respond to these problems?
"Love never gives up; and its faith, hope and patience never fail" (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) this quote shows us what Catholics should base there marriage on and it also shows us that if it is really true love it will never end and never fail.
For guidance and help one of the most reliable sources for a catholic is the bible which is the foundation of the religion. The bible contains several sections which can help spiritually and encouragement for married couples facing problems as well as anyone else facing any type of problem.
There are passages in the bible that teach a married couple several things like, how to treat each other, how to take responsibility and teaches about how to put love into practice. It also teaches them what love should be like and the qualities needed to make a marriage work. It also teaches you how to forgive each other like in Matthew 18:21- 22 where peter came to Jesus and asked “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" and Jesus replies with "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” what this is trying to teach is that you should always forgive people no matter what they have done to you.
Although the bible is said to have every answer and solution to life and its problems many people believe that the bible does not provide them with the answers they need or want so instead they look for other sources of help.
After this holy book one of the sources they might turn to is the church and the priests within it. They may speak to the priest about there problems and he will give them the appropriate advice you could also go to confession. Some churches also offer counselling sessions which provide vital information about what is wrong with the couples marriage and what they could do to fix these problems.
Outside the church there are other catholic organisations such as the CMAC which is the Catholic Marriage Advisory Council this organisation will help anyone even if they are not catholic but bases the advice they give on catholic principles.
However not all Catholics seek catholic advise some turn to such non catholic organisations such as Relate this is The National Marriage Guidance Council which works to help marriages by counselling and education services.
On the other hand I believe that not all these sources are helpful to catholic couples and they should instead simply talk to one another.
However if all of these things do not work the couple should get an annulment. An annulment is a solemn declaration made by the church to people that where present at the couples marriage stating that the couple where not actually in a real marriage. After an annulment has taken place it allows the happening of re-marriage in the Catholic Church but this does not mean it is a divorce because a divorce means that something in the marriage went wrong whereas an annulment states that it was not a real marriage.
"The Catholic teaching on the family has a positive contribution to make to our society's understanding of the family." do you agree?
This statement is equally arguable amongst people in today society. This is because some people believe that some teachings are negative and out of date. However I personally believe that the teachings of the Catholic Church have a positive contribution in today’s society, but on the other hand I also believe some teachings need to be updated to suit the modern world.
First of all I believe that it is important that we understand what the word family means. According to the oxford school dictionary a family is parents their children sometimes including grandchildren and other relations; a group of things that are alike in some ways. This is the correct definition of a family but nonetheless in the modern world there are four most common types of families. One is the nuclear family, which is married parents and children; this is usually said to be the ideal catholic marriage. Another type of family is the extended family this includes parents, children, grandchildren, aunts, uncles and cousins all living in the same house; this is often said to be an old fashion type of family. The next family is very common in today’s world, this is the broken family this is the single family that consists of one parent and children. Finally the other type of family is the stepfamily this is very common and includes stepparents and stepchildren.
I think that one of the positive teaching the Catholic Church offers is that parents should be married before having children. This way the couple show their love and commitment to one another. This teaching also allows a better life for the child who would have both committed parents; which provides a healthy environment for the children. However this can be argued because many could say this is just an assumption, because who's to say that a married couple make better parents than those who are not.
Another positive teaching from the Catholic Church is that parents should be the first teachers of the children and should teach them love and how to relate to other people. I consider this as a good teaching because this creates respect towards parents and love within the family. However this could also be argued because if parents where to teach children the wrong things this could damage the child and its life.
One of the most important teachings the Catholic Church has on the family is that the parents should provide physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually for their children. This is important because these are the things that a child needs most while growing up. These are vital needs for a child because if they are denied these necessities a child could be left mentally scared.
The Catholic Church has many positive teachings. However, on the other hand there are also some that can be seen as negative. For example the Catholic Church teaches that under no circumstances should a female have an abortion. I think that this particular teaching can be seen as negative because say a woman got raped and falls pregnant she is still not entitled to abortion. Another example is if a mother simply wants to prevent pain and suffrage for a mentally or physically ill child whom is not assured a healthy life. This mother would still not be entitled to an abortion. However these points could be argued and many could state that by allowing abortion in one case could lead to another and another.
The Catholic Church bans artificial family planning methods. This is sometimes seen as a negative teaching from the Catholic Church because if a couple wants children and are finding it difficult to conceive they are not allowed to use artificial methods of conceiving such as IVF treatment because it is against catholic teachings. This is negative in some circumstances but when looked at in depth it is obvious that the reason for this teaching is that if the Catholic Church allows IVF it may lead to further treatments like genetic engineering which is unseen of in the Catholic Church.
The Catholic Church also forbids artificial forms of contraception and sex before marriage because God told us to be fruitful and multiply but to do so where the child will be brought up into a loving family. I believe that this is probably the most argued point between Catholics today. This is because sex before marriage is very hard to avoid in today’s society and if it is happening, the ban on contraception doesn't help at all. I agree that this point is negative and old fashion because with the developments of contraception, sex is now safer and easier to have without having to worry about risks of STI’s and unwanted pregnancies.
Finally I believe that all of these teachings both have negative and positive sides to the argument. Some catholic teachings such as the one on parent’s duties towards their children do have a positive contribution to societies understanding of the family. However some teachings like the ones on artificial contraception and family planning methods are out of date and need to be adapted and improved to help young Catholics in today’s society so they can feel free to stick to the catholic religion without disobeying some teachings.
